How is your mood after OHS , was anxiety a problem before OHS

[WandaW]

Good evening all,
I work as a Rehab therapist and see the the mood changes in my clients, they are more tearful, flat affect, not quite depressed but looks like it quite often. Many talk about anxiety being a part of their lives before OHS and now that I have been through OHS almost 8 weeks ago I have struggeled with the mood changes. I am curious if anyone else has. Ok, I am really checking to see if all these different feelings are "normal" for this recovery process.

 

[Cooker]

I was a bit anxious before but not to the point where it was debilitating ... post-op was a bit more stressful ... I had a few bumps in the road (nothing uncommon) but just when I would get over one little obstacle another one popped up almost immediately ... left me feeling a bit venerable ... but once the speed bumps were gone my mood and state of mind returned to normal pretty quickly....

 

[Jason]

I didn't have much time between discovery of the aneurysm and the surgery, so I didn't have too much anxiety prior. I was very busy trying to figure out my options, where to get it done, when to get it done, etc. After the surgery I have had anxiety off and on, and it is frustrating.

I just realized a few days ago that I am watching for something to be wrong still. I am going through my day, acting 'normal' for all intents. However, I catch myself listening to my heart (mechanical, so I can hear it) and watching for it either going too fast, too slow, pounding, etc. I don't know why I am doing this, and it would be a lot easier if I just accepted it and went on, but so far I haven't been able to shake it. I don't know if anyone else has encountered this, but that is how my anxiety is manifesting itself.

 

[WandaW]

I did purchase a POLAR Heart monitor after my first real run of Atrial Flutter and I still wear it for exercise, walking, household chores, to get a sense of where my heart rate is. I was very anxious after the bouts of Atrial Flutter started, almost too scared to do anything. Now after my Ablation this week I enjoy watching my heart rate sit in the 80's and low 90's when I am sitting down doing stuff and only jumping to 93 when I walk around,

 

[epstns]

Wanda,
Before surgery, I was one of those who seemed to exist in a surreal calm zone. Of course, I had over 9 years to get myself mentally prepared for surgery and for making all the choices that need to be made before the Big Event. I didn't seem to experience any anxiety before surgery -- because I had been through all that years before when I was first diagnosed. The anxiety was pretty bad back then, but had settled down over the years.

After surgery, I did find that for the first couple of weeks I had some of those unexplained bouts of teary eyes. I didn't outright cry, but my eyes would tear up and I would be on the verge of crying. No rhyme or reason as to what would trigger it, but usually extreme happiness. I attributed it to being so thankful to be alive and to have what amounts to a second chance at life.

The tears only happened for a couple of weeks, and now (9 weeks post-op), I find that things are settling down to normal. I'm doing well and my mind is at peace. I am, however, ever watchful for signs of depression, as this is very common among heart surgery patients. If this happens, I have some knowledge of ways to deal with it, and if those fail I wouldn't hesitate to get help. Life is too good to waste it in a depressed state that doesn't need to be.

 

[ChicagoMammy]

I am a somewhat anxious person anyway but was calm enough until a day or two before surgery. I was not as bad as I thought. Afterwards I was very emotional. Easy to cry. Almost like post-partum. Not severe just there. Apart from the difficulty of having surgery there is definitely something hormonal/psychological to it too.

 

[CanoeBob]

My surgery was the end of November 2010, there was a real up and down roller coaster for the month of December and January. I was working wwwaaayyy to hard to keep myself on an emotional steady keel. During that part of recovery I had hauled out every congitive tool in the box to try and abate but no success, the seesaw wouldn't stop. I surrendered to the fact that there are drugs that help, got on Citalopram an anti-aniety and anti-depressant and after the kick in period of a week or so the curtain raised, light streamed in and I could cope far better. I can stop anytime I want, but I'm still on it. I'm starting a new career search to coinside with the new life I've been given, which all the books say is stressful so I think I'll just stay on it for a bit...stress is no good to a repairing heart and I'll take all the help I can get.

Bob

 

[Protimenow]

For me, it's been nearly 20 years since my OHS, so memories of mood probably aren't as strong as they would be for the 'newbies' posting here. I don't recall any tremendous swings after surgery -- certainly no extreme sadness or depression.
I wonder if some of this may be related to other meds that are prescribed during this post-operative period.

OTOH -- our bodies and minds probably tell us when we're not 'whole' -- like when we've got a cracked sternum that is working hard to heal -- and this can effect our outlook.

A few things:

I recently had a cataract surgery and have noticed a big change for the better. What I think happened was that my brain realized that I was less than whole -- that I was effectively blind in one eye -- and the way I interacted with the world reflected my brain's adjusting to being 'less than whole.' The reason I bring this up is that the situation with post-op OHS is that the body is not 'whole' - and the brain knows this. We compensate in order to protect ourselves from situations that may damage the healing body. So -- sadness or depression may keep us from going out and riding a motorcycle or doing risky activities that could put us at physical risk. These moods may be just a protective mechanism that makes us less likely to put our healing bodies at risk. (The nice part is that, once we're healed and effectively as good as or better than new, our brains also know this, and your moods might be much improved).

I heard years ago that a piece of what we are (our 'soul'?) is missing after we have heart surgery -- we're no longer the people we were before surgery. I've heard this from a number of people. It's like a piece of who we are is gone. I don't know how to evaluate this -- has anyone seen any evidence in their experience?

 

[epstns]

Protimenow - It may be that we react to losing a part of our bodies, but it may also be that we react to having a part added to our bodies and we are so profoundly glad to have that new part and the expansion of life that comes with it that we are easily moved to tears of joy. We just do not know the reason for the tears at that time. As we gain deeper understanding, we return to a more normal mood more often.

Also, for most of us this is the first time we really, truly realize that we are mortal and that there is a time at which we will die. This surgery allows us to have a longer life, complete with the future joys we will likely experience. We may react to this with tears of joy at the prospect of future life experiences. I know I did.

 

[Mentu]

Hi, Wanda, my most difficult period was that following the day my cardio told me that it was time for me to speak with a surgeon. For a month my emotions were all over the place; hearing a song or a sad movie could leave me sobbing and my temper developed a hair trigger. When I spoke about my emotional roller coaster with my regular Doctor, she recommended that I begin taking an antidepressant. She explained that it could also be helpful later because many people experience depression several weeks after surgery which can slow recovery. She considered that if I was having a difficult time before surgery that I might be one of those likely to have a problem later. My Doctor said that it is not well understood why one should experience depression after a life saving surgery but she believes that it may have something to do with experiencing "a loss of one's sense of well being" that is only regained as one can return to a more normal life. At any rate, since I had begun taking the antidepressant a month before my surgery, I had no significant problem during those early months of recovery.

Larry

Then I met my surgeon and discussed the details of surgery and set a day; after that I began feeling somewhat better emotionally although physically I felt worse and worse.

 

[Bryan B]

Wanda,

There is a similar thread about the emotional side of OHS so I am copying and pasting it (too lazy to think of something new...lol).

I think I went through all the stages of grief before my first OHS. As for the 2nd one, I had to fight so hard to get financial assistance that once I got it I actually felt a sense of relief. I do have to admit that once I got the assistance I thought to myself...uh oh now I have to go through it, but the emotional aspect was not as strong as before the first one. Part of that could also be that I had been through it once already and didn't have all of the "what if's" running rampant in my head.

Having said that I seem to struggle more with the emotional aspect of it after the surgery for several months. I don't know if it is PTS, if it's the feeling of helplessness for a period of time, or if it is just a normal chemical reaction after your heart has been cut on. After the first surgery it went away once I got a job and went back to living a reasonably normal life. But after the first one and also this recent one I can have just about anything move me to tears.

BTW I'm glad your ablation went well.