Worried about my Dad after surgery

[kfay]

I have to say that if he were my father, I would have him out of there today! My mother was in a rehab place for 6 weeks after back surgery and I have no doubt if I hadn't been there every single day they would have killed her. When I had my surgery a month ago, I didn't get a shower until day 6 and I had a bench to sit on and the nurse actually came into the shower with me and stayed the whole time.

Have you looked into flying him home now? Alot of us who travel long distances for heart surgery fly or drive home a week or so after...if he is stable maybe your brother could fly him home sooner than planned.

Good luck to you and your family...I hope everything turns out well.

Kim

 

[Pamela8]

thanks Gina

Al-I definetely will be making calls regarding the shower and the catheter and other things.

He did have a shower chair, when he went to sit back down it slid out from him and he fell to his knees. I don't know if thats accurate though as I wonder if he fell from being weak or possibly lightheaded.

But he should have had someone right there with him like you said and others said.

Kim-have to get the ok from his cardiologist to fly home, am going to get home ASAP.

That was one of my initail concerns in my first post, about how this fall might have affected the surgery area Knowing my Dad he would try and get up on his own first without calling out for help.

I am so glad to have found this forum, going nuts with worry and your support a big help, as I really did not know what to expect post surgery.

Pam

 

[geebee]

Pam,

We know you are worried about your father or you wouldn't have made your way here. We can all be a bit blunt sometimes but it is because timing can be so crucial and not to be wasted sometimes on niceties.

Weakness, pain, dizziness, etc. are all part of recovery. That is why it is so important to have someone around. I know you and your brother thought you were doing the right thing and, if the facility had been a good one, all would be well. How were you to know? We are just concerned about leaving him there as every member (or member's family) become part of ours when you join. We talk to you as if we were talking to our own family and we do not mince words when a patient's safety is at stake.

I hope things improve and your father is home very soon.

 

[Curtsmum]

Sorry you are going through this must be a nightmare. Hope you can get your dad home very soon. Sending prayers and best wishes to your dad and family.

 

[Pamela8]

My brother talked to our Dad today, he had a bad night, couldn't sleep, had some pressure in his chest. The bloodwork came back, slight anemia.
My Aunt and Uncle visited him today and told my brother physically he seemed ok, but didn't seem to want to do anything for himself.

I talked to the nurse tonight, she said my name was not on the list of relatives to discuss my Dad with, but my brother put my Aunt, himself and me on it when he was there.

The nurse did talk though, told me he had a rough night, that the pressure in his chest was part of the healing. She said he refuses pain meds only will take one at night. She said she offered him xanax to relief him anxiety, he told her its not anxiety somethings wrong.

I asked her if someone stays in the shower with him since his fall, she said he refuses showers and they have a hard time even getting him to wash up.

She said he is in the mindset that something physically is wrong, she told him phsyically he is doing well, but he is too anxious . She assumed he is always like this, and I told her, actually no, he always follows drs orders always takes his meds, and never complains about his health unless he had to go to the ER in afib, after trying to convert at home..

She said they are weighing him , taking vitals and that his swelling has gone down.

When my brother talked to Dad, my Dad said he would wait for soemone to come in to bring him to the shower, no one shows up, and he pushes the call button and its not answered.

My Dad an appt with him primary/urologist Wednesday, my brother is going to get it moved up ASAP. And he will be calling the nurse tommorow to see what is going on. I will be calling my Dad also. Like I said he never complains, but I 'm going to get him to talk more to me.

Pam

 

[Nancy]

I hate to say this because you have enough stress already, but that nursing home seems like a lousy place for a heart surgery patient to recover. He is getting substandard care and less than humane care.

I have taken care of my husband through many thoracic surgeries and I can tell you that to expect someone who has had heart surgery to "do for himself" within the first few weeks is inhumane and even sound cruel to me.

He's weak, he's exhausted, he's in pain and he needs help not criticism.

I am not sure I would believe what the nurse has said.

You are indeed in a bad spot because you are so far away.

I am concerned about your dad. I am sure he is anxious and probably scared of the care there. The fact that no one will respond to his call button proves my point. If need be they could easily give him a bed bath. I did that for my husband every day of his hospitalizations. The aides there could do that for him, at the very least.

Also, he should be taking his pain meds because if the pain get ahead of him, he won't be able to do much at all. Pain meds are to help get the patient back to normal faster.

 

[Nancy]

I just noticed your post about Schenectady and Rotterdam. Small world! St. Peter's is excellent, so is Ellis Hospital where Joe had three thoracic surgeries.

 

[geebee]

Pam,

I am sorry but I too am worried about your dad. It sounds like he is crying for help in the form of getting the care he needs and it must seem to him like nothing is being done.

I have seen people give up getting better because no one answers their requests for help.

Please do whatever can be done to move him. If he is seen by the staff as someone who won't cooperate with what they want him to do (take pills, wash up, etc.) then they will pay less and less attention to him. Right now he needs more, not less, care.

 

[Susan BAV]

Hi Pam - I'm sorry to thicken the plot but perhaps some of the meds he is taking could be causing him emotional issues. Pain meds in excess can cause feelings of impending doom. Even some simple medication combinations can cause temporary emotional problems such as a combination of lasix and a common thyroid med. Hopefully all his meds are being cross-checked for contraindications and such. Just being in the hospital is depressing, of course, let alone recovering from open heart surgery.

Thank you for the updates. We are all pulling for your father's recovery and well-being. Hang in there.

 

[Pamela8]

I'm at my daughters where I can call long distance . Talked to my Dad's nurse and mentioned his appt with kidney dr/primary dr this Wednesday, she said there was no record of it and no schedluled appts.

Called his kidney drs office and yes he is scheduled to be seen at 3pm. Talked to drs nurse and told her all of my concerns. Started out with the fall in the shower, she checked his chart and it was never reported to his doctor. I told her how he was left alone, and all that has occured. She was very concerned and relaying all info to the doctor. also told her how the nurse this morning said they slipped my Dad a xanax without him knowing to calm his nerves.

The nurse said she would call the nursing home and tell them that yes he has an appt and they need to see him. The nursning home has transprotation, a wheelchair van.

So glad my Dad will be seeing his own doctor.

Pam

 

[geebee]

Pam,

I am happy you are staying on top of things. Each thing you mention just indicates that these folks are on their own agenda and your dad seems to just be a thorn. I cannot believe they gave him meds without his okay - makes you wonder what else they are pulling.

Hopefully his doctor can get into things and make a decision that will help your dad.

Thanks for keeping us update. Praying that things improve.

 

[ALCapshaw2]

Pam,

Has anyone told your dad's Heart Surgeon about the Fall in the Shower, and how he is being treated at this facility?

I would want to know exactly how he got up from his fall.
Did the aid assist him?

Did your dad use his ARMS to pull himself up?
Or did the aid pull him up by his ARMS?

I would think the Surgeon would be VERY CONCERNED about either of those possibilities and might want to examine his sternum to be sure the healing is progressing properly and was not damaged.

Is there any way someone could be with him daily to monitor his treatment? If not, I would seriously look into another facility.

Finally, the Surgeon REALLY needs to know what kind of treatment he has received at this facility since he is the one that sent him there.

'AL Capshaw'

 

[Nancy]

Absolutely--the surgeon has to know what kind of place his hospital is sending his patients to to recover.

This nursing home is sounding worse and worse.

It sounds like nothing more than a warehouse with no compassion and terrible care.

Some states have a site set up where you can report bad nursing home care. Some states also have a site where you can look up every nursing home in the state and see what the violations were and if they have been resolved.

I know I looked up every nursing home they were going to send Joe to when he had a stroke. I was shocked when I read the reports! I had a very nasty and difficult meeting with the people who were involved in setting up aftercare. I showed them the reports and told them they shouldn't be sending anyone to one of the facilities, and that the others were equally abysmal.

I ended up taking care of him at home, where I at least knew he would be loved and cared for with compassion. We had in home therapy and some visiting nursing care.

Some of the most egregious items I found were:

Mistreatment and neglect of patients.
Unsafe conditions.
Inability to give injections properly.
Medication errors, either deliberate or inadvertent.
Not responding to patients.
Unnecessary catheter usage.
Facility caused infections.
Leaving patients in the wheelchair too long.
Tying patients to the bed or wheelchair.
Bedsores caused by not changing patients' positions enough.
No medical care.
Poor food.
Lack of personal care.
Filthy conditions both generally and in the patient's rooms.
Under-staffing.

And several others.

Some facilities went for years without resolving issues.

Here's the list for Fla.

http://www.memberofthefamily.net/uscompl/fl.htm#105693