Thanks for the help

[anutherbuddy]

I have been skimming VR.org articles and forums for a long time and have found much comfort and support here. When waves of panic start to set in, this is where I can always go for help. My husband has been in the waiting room for nearly 10 years and now, finally, has been given a date (Sep 12) for OHS to replace both MV and AV. He's 64 and has elected to go with porcine parts. When the aortic aneurysm was first diagnosed the cardiologist said "you're the first person I've ever seen alive with this!" (it was at a training hospital - what can I say?) and for 10 years I feel like I've watched him like he was a time bomb - was he about to explode? He's not one to study and search on the internet so I've been doing most of the research. He's remained asymptomatic throughout, which is great - it's just hard to think about him feeling so lousy after the surgery when he feels perfectly fine beforehand. I checked out the "significant others" site but there has been no action there for over a month - I'd love to hear from others who have had to wait and watch. Thanks again for all the help and suggestions.

 

[Mike1952]

Anutherbuddy,

I am speaking for my wife, here (she is not one to do much research, it is me that gets into that). I was pretty much asymptomatic when my leaking aortic valve was discovered in June. My poor wife had to listen to me as I processed all the information I could find and used her as a sounding board. About a week before the surgery (Aug 9th), I noticed how upset she was and realized I had been putting all my stress on her. From that point forward, I made a conscious decision to quit worrying about it (at least verbally) and accept I was in good hands.
When the surgery started, again she had all the worry. There was a "bump" in the road when I started bleeding after they had sewed me up. They reopened the wound to make sure the new valve was not bleeding and to check if all was ok. So, I was out for all of this. Poor Patsy had to do all the worrying!
So, I sure understand where you are coming from and appreciate all spouses for their support! Be sure to communicate with the hospital staff. They were wonderful for my wife. I looked pretty bad in ICU but they convinced her to go home and rest and that I was fine. The next morning, I had tubes in my throat (still unconscious) and neck and arms. Patsy went to lunch and came back and I was sitting in a chair! She couldn't believe it!
The first couple of days in the hospital were a little rough for me because I didn't know what to expect, but really it wasn't too bad! The nurses are really great. Tell your husband to ask them lots of questions, they are there to help.
I am now two weeks post surgery. We thought it would be a real burden for Patsy to care for me at home but it has been much easier than expected. I am feeling great, other than a little tired and sore.

 

[anutherbuddy]

Hi Mike1952 - I feel like I already know you because I've read your earlier posts - glad you are coming along well. I have to make sure I don't stress him out with too much information. He is really easy-going and peaceful, generally trusts the doctors and just wants to get on with this. My daughters and I do all the worrying, I guess. I'm just tired of the doctors always giving us the "worst case scenario" but I guess they have to cover all bases. This group shows me that the procedures can be done and it can be ok.

 

[Greg a]

Hi Mike1952 - I feel like I already know you because I've read your earlier posts - glad you are coming along well. I have to make sure I don't stress him out with too much information. He is really easy-going and peaceful, generally trusts the doctors and just wants to get on with this. My daughters and I do all the worrying, I guess. I'm just tired of the doctors always giving us the "worst case scenario" but I guess they have to cover all bases. This group shows me that the procedures can be done and it can be ok.

WELCOME TO THE FAMILY ,,,,I have entered hubby for Sept 12th on the family calendar you are not alone! You will be his strongest advocate and you should be prepared to excercise that knowledge you have gained. I often tell people that I would not be here today had it not been for the strength and voice of my wife and YES t`hose two words `worst case`are maybe used too often but you can never be too prepared for any eventuality or hurdle to cross. Godspeed to both you and husband as well as daughters and please do use this fantastic resource as often as needed that is why Hank created VR.ORG

 

[Lynlw]

Hi, Glad to hear you've found comfort here over the years before you joined. I'm sorry to hear you've stressed and worried about the annuerysm for such a long time. I'm not the patient, my son is the one that has had all the heart surgeries, so i can understand, how helpless it can make you feel when so much is out of your hands and you want to just fix things. Luckily for me at least, I've gtten good at not thinking about it too much unless there are appts or procedures coming up.
Hopefully you will be surprised at how soon he feels better after surgery.

 

[anutherbuddy]

Thanks folks. Can anyone chime in regarding double valve replacements? He's to have MVR and AVR (with Aortic Root repair). Anything different about recovery or anything we need to know about?