thanks for the birthday wishes... been gone a long time...
thanks for the birthday wishes... been gone a long time...
hi all,
i haven't been on at all for so long.... life gets busy sometimes...
after a long year of struggling with a bad valve, joey's dad was 89 and not really a candidate for ohs, so we watched as he deteriorated and became shorter and shorter of breath. in addition to several other health issues, he died a week before my birthday.
joey's parents live a mile from our house and since they were both elderly, we were often the ones on call.
his dad had a long, full life. being the wonderful man he was, i swear he "weaned us off of him". he started deteriorating and withdrawing when his hearing started going. little by little, he became so sob that he could barely make it to our weekly monday night dinner rituals. when he did, he participated less and less. eventually, he lost his appetite (very unlike him) and was unable to come to dinner at all since he slept most of the time.
so we got used to a three person table for some time before he left us.
by the time he passed away, he had been absent from social events for some time and although he is missed so very much, it was not as shocking or as sudden. still, it's so difficult for us all; he was the ultimate patriarch.
joey's mom is still alive and we all pitch in and take care of her.
she is somewhat confused, has had several mini strokes and her vision is going. she doesn't move well and her loss of vision make it even more difficult to get around. she is upset by that. we often use a walker or wheelchair with her. she misses her husband, but doesn't seem to harp on it. i think it's a bit of forgetfulness/ dementia settling in ( a blessing?)
in any case, we buried my father in law, sat shiva for 3 days (we're jewish), and the next day took our youngest daughter back to school in st.louis. she is having the hardest time, not having had a chance to grieve and being far from us. naturally, this breaks my heart and saddens me terribly. in fact, so much saddens me lately. i see how vulverable we all are.
i think of joey, i think of my dad (also a valver), i worry.
all in all, it's been a very difficult year for our families. joey is struggling (he and his dad worked in the same office every day for so many years. i can see the void in his life).
on the flip side, joey's 6 year anniversary is this week (20th).
he is feeling well and going strong. i thank God every day for this miracle and his health.
i think of you all often and wish i could make more time to come here.
i hope you are all well.
hugs,
sylvia