Corn Pone

[Cooker]

OK I heard this joke and though it would be a fun thread to share our corny jokes!! It's simple, just share the corniest joke that you have heard. My niece told me this one so you can thank her!!!!

What did the Italian fisherman say when he caught an eel?????

Ready????

"That's Amore"

LOL LOL

 

[Bina]

Okay, the Moron family is enjoying a lovely day hiking in the forest, when they come upon a cliff and decide to stand near the edge to enjoy the view.
Sadly, Mr. Moron falls off.
Then Mrs. Moron falls off.
Why did their child not fall off?


Because she was a little Moron.....

 

[Cooker]

Okay, the Moron family is enjoying a lovely day hiking in the forest, when they come upon a cliff and decide to stand near the edge to enjoy the view.
Sadly, Mr. Moron falls off.
Then Mrs. Moron falls off.
Why did their child not fall off?


Because she was a little Moron.....

hehehehehe

 

[Bina]

2 Budgie birds are sitting on a perch.
One says to the other: " I smell fish"

 

[Cooker]

2 Budgie birds are sitting on a perch.
One says to the other: " I smell fish"

Now that stinks LOL

 

[Cooker]

A duck walks into a drug store.....

Clerk: May I help you?
Duck: A tube of chap-stick please.
Clerk: That will be 89 cents.

Duck: Just put it on my bill.

 

[Bina]

2 fish are in a tank.
One says to the other: "how do you drive this thing?"

 

[Freddie]

Two electricians are sitting having coffee at a construction site when the carpenter walks by with a set of stairs. One electrician asks "are those the up-stairs or the down stairs?"
The carpenter wasn't sure!

More..........................scroll down





No joke.
This is based on a true story

 

[Praline]

Here is one of the many Boudreaux/Thibodeaux floating around here in LA.

Boudreaux and Thibodeaux were out fishing. They were catching more fish than they had ever caught.
Boudreaux said, " This is a good fishing spot. Let's mark it so we can find it again next time."
Thibodeaux said, " Great idea. I'll make an X right here at the bottom of the boat."
Boudreaux replied, " But that won't work! What if we use the other boat next time?"

 

[Lisa in Katy]

This was told to me by someone with a deep southern accent, so you have to think that way when you read it.

What do my hand and a pie have in common?

Meringue!

 

[Cooker]

This was told to me by someone with a deep southern accent, so you have to think that way when you read it.

What do my hand and a pie have in common?

Meringue!

Whew!! That's another stinker

 

[Bina]

Here is one of the many Boudreaux/Thibodeaux floating around here in LA.

Boudreaux and Thibodeaux were out fishing. They were catching more fish than they had ever caught.
Boudreaux said, " This is a good fishing spot. Let's mark it so we can find it again next time."
Thibodeaux said, " Great idea. I'll make an X right here at the bottom of the boat."
Boudreaux replied, " But that won't work! What if we use the other boat next time?"

Praline,
I was just telling Cooker how my father is the king of corny jokes.....this joke he told to me about 30 years ago.....longevity or what?
Thanks!

 

[Dennis S]

What did the fish say when he swam into the cement wall?

Dam!

 

[Dennis S]

The greates third grade joke ever!

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?

Anyone can roast beef.

 

[Lisa in Katy]

Dennis, you're right about the second one. It is really quite funny (if you're a 3rd grader).

 

[Karlynn]

Wow, I'm thinking we need to run a VR age test here!!!! You kids are just plain silly!

 

[Bina]

My husband's motto in life:
You are juvenile only once in yourlife.....
But you can be immature forever

 

[Debbrn]

NUMBER ONE:

Question: Why can't a bicycle stand up by itself?
Answer: Because it is two tired.

NUMBER TWO:

Question: What do you call a cow with no legs?
Answer: Ground beef.

NUMBER THREE:

Question: Why did the filthy chicken cross the road twice?
Answer: Because he was a dirty double crosser.

NUMBER FOUR:

Question: Why did the skeleton not go to the dance?
Answer: Because he had no body to dance with.

Do you want me to go on?

As a pediatric nurse, I tell these terrible jokes to the kids that can't get out of bed and I am giving them morphine. If they don't laugh, I'm really in trouble.

 

[Bina]

Did you hear about the dentist and the manicurist?

They fought tooth and nail.

 

[Lisa in Katy]

This isn't really a "corny" joke, but it made me laugh.

A young woman was bringing her grandmother home from her 98-year-old grandfather's funeral.

With tears streaming down her face, the young woman said, "Grandma, I can't believe he's gone."

"Well, dear. We were having sex. At least he died happy."

Amazed that her grandparents were still having sex at 98, the young woman asked, "Do you think it's safe for people to have sex at your age?"

Grandma replied, "Well, the doctor said as long as we took it slow and easy, it was okay, so we relied on God to set the pace."

"What? God?"

"Well, we listened for the church bell. In with the ding. Out with the dong."

Suddenly, Grandma's eyes welled up with tears. "He would still be alive if the ice cream truck hadn't come along!"