What do I need to plan for when coming home?

[vhmoriarty]

Okay so now I have found people that can tell me what to expect with the surgery....Now what happens when I come home?

Will I be able to be home by myself?

My husband is planning on taking off from work under the FMLA. Work has approved it. But it is without pay. That is going to be a huge disturbance to our already low income life. He is going to take his days off each week back to back so it will make four days off at one time...ie: thurs, fri, sat, sun. So I would be home alone about three days alone.

The only family I have is my mother who will be watching my daughter. She lives only 10 mins away and I live in a apartment complex where people said they will check on me as well. My sister can only come in on weekends. Billys family can only help with the kids on the weekends as well. So im just wondering what would be a good plan.

Does this sound like a okay plan?

 

[ottagal]

Hi Valerie,

My post op instructions states that someone should be with me for the first week.

Did you check out the thread on "how to prepare a house for the homecoming patient' in the post-surgery thread. It has some good tibbits of info.
Sorry I can't help you with the other questions as I haven't had the surgery yet (but its just around the corner !!!).

Take care,

 

[vhmoriarty]

Hi Valerie,

My post op instructions states that someone should be with me for the first week.

Did you check out the thread on "how to prepare a house for the homecoming patient' in the post-surgery thread. It has some good tibbits of info.
Sorry I can't help you with the other questions as I haven't had the surgery yet (but its just around the corner !!!).

Take care,

i actually read that last week. We have everything here for me, but I dont want to burden people with having to stay here. I live in a apartment complex with people here all the time. So I am just trying to figure everything out.

 

[TenPly]

Well, it sounds like you have a lot of people around ready to help, which is good. By the time you're released to go home, you should be well enough to care for your own basic needs. And of course, if you can have someone around to cook and take care of household business, so you can just focus on recovering, that would be best, I think.

When I got home, I only focused on me. My parents took care of everything else from cooking to picking up prescriptions, etc.

A big one is making sure all your laundry is done -- all bed linens, towels clothes, etc., so you won't have to wash anything right away.

 

[Superman]

If your mother lives only ten minutes away is there a reason she couldn't:

Watch your daughter at your house?

Have you dropped off with your daughter to pull up an easy chair for the day at her house?

 

[Freddie]

Personally IMHO, you should have some there 24/7 for at least the first week. You may not be able to even open the fridge door......no I'm not kidding.
We all heal differently and I strongly suggest to have someone there with you for the first week. The first week is the toughest, the second week may be easier for you, but only time will tell.

 

[Glenda]

I didn't have anyone stay with me but our business is just right across the street so my husband always came home at noon and I knew all I had to do was call the office and someone would be here immediatley. My oldest daughter came over everyday for a week and fixed supper and cleaned the house and did the laundry. That helped a bunch. Also people from church dropped by all the time and they always brought food. You know Baptist, they are the best cooks. So I think you'll be find since you have people close around you.

 

[dsouter]

I couldn't get out of bed by myself for a week or more much less do much else.

My GF is planning on taking the day of the surgery and the 1st week that I am home off.

Worked well for me last time.

Hope it does so the next time.

 

[Jkm7]

Both my surgeries, Mass General's policy was the patient should have someone with them the first week at home. They were clear with me my second surgery (less so the first) that didn't mean 24/7. It was fine for that 'someone' going to the grocery store, running an errand, leaving you for an hour or so. But to not shower, wash your hair or do anything potentially risky while alone for that first week. That would be a good time for a nap.

My reality was (both surgeries - though even more so the second one which followed the first by four years), that I was really fine to be alone. I obeyed their instructions for a few days and had someone here until I knew my own limitations and never showered when alone for about ten days. My bedroom is up a flight of stairs and I had no issue walking them. Do it slowly and do NOT pull yourself using the handrail.

From the first day home, I was able to set the dinner table for DH and me, fix a salad, 'zap' whatever food friends had brought us and wash the dishes after. I have a fabulous husband who happily would have done all that but I was able and wanted to be as active as I could and get back on my feet. I never did more than I should and both times (most gratefully) had bump free recoveries.

Everyone is different. Some people need considerable help for weeks. Others really don't need much more than someone to carry heavy groceries and drive us to appointments/pick up Rx's.

You are young and if otherwise healthy, hopefully you will be among those who don't need a lot of assistance. If that is the case, having apartment neighbors nearby to give you a hand as needed should work fine for you with your Mom watching your daughter.

Best wishes.

 

[Danny]

At my discharge class from Texas Heart Institute, We were told It would be best to have someone here for the first week, but that it wasnt the job of the spouse or freinds to sit and babysit me. They really encourage the patient to be independent. Ive been home since Monday night, and this is my second day alone... My wife finishes work at noon, so im ok with it.. plus the phone sits right next to me. It really depends on the person recovering. Like someone stated earlier, you may not be able to open the fridge, or a drink... luckily, im able to move about pretty good, and do most task within reason. Im not gonna go against any of the restrictions they put me on... I dont go out and walk until she gets home with me. But you will know what you can and cant do. Good luck.

 

[vhmoriarty]

Im hoping that I can get away with the neighbors helping. My mom and husbands work are only 10 mins away. What I worry about if my daughter is here (2yr) that she will be trying to climb all over me like she does. My mother will be coming over daily though to help and I will see my daughter then, but having her here while I am healing may not be a good idea. My son (6) is my real helper. He is Mr. Independent will be at school he gets out at 3 though and our landlord will be picking him up and dropping him off. So I am pretty sure I can try to wing it with everyone contributing a hour or so on things. We will see.

 

[Nancy]

After helping my husband through several thoracic surgeries. I urge you to have someone with you 24/7 the first week, at least. You have small children, and you will not be able to lift them or do anything strenuous for at least 6-8 weeks to allow your sternum to heal properly.

You will also have a driving restriction for about the same amount of time.

You will be very weak and very sore and rather out of it. You may even be on an emotional roller coaster.

Sleeping will be difficult for a couple of weeks. You will be unsteady on the shower and getting up and down into a chair or your bed.

This is very major surgery. Yes, there are some who have few problems, but the majority will need help for the first week and possibly the second as well, especially with small children in the house.

Having a recliner chair is a good idea, and get a small plastic shower chair so you can sit down if you need to while showering.

Expect to be tired and to need to nap frequently.

 

[kschroed]

You need help. If something happens with your children, you won't be able to do anything to help. If you pick one of them up, you will disturb your incision (and sternum) and end up back in the hospital. For the safety of your kids, you need to have someone else around.
Kay

 

[Dorsai]

My recovery (day #7 now) has been going well enough that I would have been OK by myself at home. However, I would not want to be by myself with a small child, such as my 4 year-old. Not only can I not play with him, if anything happens to him there's nothing I can do for him other than to make a phone call and hope someone comes.

 

[vhmoriarty]

Okay my mother will have my 2 year old at her home, not mine so she isnt crawling all over me.

My 6 year old will be in school and neighbors will be getting him to and from school.

My husband works 5 mins from our apartment. My landlord lives next to me.

 

[kfay]

Valerie, I got discharged on day 8 I think which was a Friday. My husband was obviously home that weekend and was planning on taking off the next week. But by Monday, I felt comfortable enough staying home for a minimum of several hours on my own, so he would go to meetings and then check back in. If I needed him, he would come home, if not, he would stay. Obviously, he would take our kids to school and pick them up. The scariest thing for me was showering and so I always made sure to do this while he was home. I was fine opening the refrigerator and anything else I needed to do. If it had been me in your situation, I would have been fine with the plans that you have put in place. Unfortunately, you won't know how well you respond to this surgery until it is all over.

Kim

 

[vhmoriarty]

I plan on basically staying in the bed and our bathroom is next to our bedroom for the duration no one is with me anyhow. I have a small cooler that my husband said he would put into our room a long with my phone which will probally be ringing every ten minutes anyhow, lol

 

[Jkm7]

Actually, if you are having a smooth recovery, you really should not remain in bed all day. Take naps as needed but I was told to get out of bed each morning, shower and dress as usual, be as independent as safe and I was able and do my walking. (I was given booklet from Mass General both of my surgeries full of info and walking schedule.) The walking is Very important though you should not go outside to walk alone with no one home watching you. But it is fine to move around your home as much as you are up to.

Use common sense and good judgment and don't over push yourself but by all means be as active as possible in order to get your strength back. As important as walking and eating healthfully is to carefully follow lifiting instructions you will be given. For most of us it is in the range of no more than 8-10 pounds and for some folks, even less.

 

[Danny]

The laying in bed all day is really not recommended as stated above. They want you to walk..walk...walk. It helps so much with recovery.

 

[vhmoriarty]

Well I meant Im not going to get in the shower, run up and down the stairs, or tackle a treadmill without someone being here the first two weeks with me, lol