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Rainbow

Active member
Joined
Jun 24, 2019
Messages
27
Hi all. I live in Northland, New Zealand. My husband has aortic stenosis and is scheduled for an open heart valve replacement on 9th July. We will have to travel to Auckland for this so hoping it isn't cancelled due to incomings. I have read so many threads in these forums, joined Facebook groups and Googled like crazy in the belief that knowledge is power. But now we have a date I feel bogged down with too much information and I am too exhausted at the thought of sifting through it to find what applies for us. I thought about why I have spent so much time researching and I know it is because I need to find things that reassure me that he will come through the surgery ok, will recover well and we will live long and happily for the rest of our lives. My quest to find out what he should take in with him, how I can support best him in hospital, and the best way to get him home comfortably now seem like minor concerns. But I guess it kept me busy and, to a degree, it stopped me from worrying about whether he would keel over before we got a date for the replacement. The next week is going to be really hard. He is swinging from "I don't need surgery - I'm not in any pain." to "Well I've had a good life so if I don't make it through surgery that's ok." I just try to be as positive as I can but I have fears too, naturally. March 10th this year was our 40th Wedding anniversary. I am visualising the celebration we will have for our 50th Golden anniversary. It will be a great day. 🤞
 

Agian

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 10, 2013
Messages
2,236
Location
Adelaide, South Australia
Well Rainbow, the proof that he'll be alright is us. Been there, done that. When I was wheeled in, I was having a field day from the medications. Next thing you know, they're pulling the tube out. I spent the next few days taking selfies.

He'll be ok sweetie.
 

Zoltania

VR.org Supporter
Joined
Feb 16, 2015
Messages
185
Location
SF Bay Area, California
Rainbow, no one can promise you that things will go perfectly, but your husband's odds are very very good. It's easy to focus on the worst possible outcome, but that's not representative of what's actually likely to happen.

Steve Epstein said it better than I can:

How the mind works
 

Duffey

Me and Granbon
Joined
Sep 29, 2004
Messages
5,193
Location
Far side of the moon
I am 99% sure that all will go well. He may encounter some unexpected bumps along the road to recovery, but in the long run, he should recover completely. My husband is also scheduled for cardiac surgery on July 9th. It’s certainly not comparable to your husband’s, but I understand your worry and sympathize. Good luck and best wishes.
 

Rainbow

Active member
Joined
Jun 24, 2019
Messages
27
I am 99% sure that all will go well. He may encounter some unexpected bumps along the road to recovery, but in the long run, he should recover completely. My husband is also scheduled for cardiac surgery on July 9th. It’s certainly not comparable to your husband’s, but I understand your worry and sympathize. Good luck and best wishes.
I don't think it's about comparing. All surgery carries risk. I wish your husband good luck and hopefully sometime soon after the 9th we will both be able to report how successful the ops have been. :)
 

FredW

Premium Level User
Joined
Dec 16, 2015
Messages
249
Location
Rochester Mills, PA
Rainbow, I'm sure you know what you are going through is normal. It would be abnormal, for either of you, to not worry.

Of course, the people who don't make it aren't writing on this forum, but Again is correct, we are good examples of the great odds that you and your husband will return here and post your experiences.

Each of us handles the fears of surgery differently so be patient with your husband and yourself. My life three years after surgery is much better than my life in the three years leading up to it. I suspect many of those on this forum could say that.

It is also true that I appreciate my anniversaries, birthdays, and just plain every day more than I ever have. Few of us go from the waiting room to the other side and come out with the same view of life.

You and your husband will be OK, but be prepared to enjoy life more.
 

Protimenow

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 10, 2010
Messages
2,765
Location
California
Rainbow: Before surgery, patients are usually tested to make sure that they're good candidates for the surgery, that the surgery will actually help them, and that a good outcome is expected.

If your husband didn't meet these criteria, I don't think the surgeons would have suggested the surgery.

It's possible to over-research, and over-think any surgery (or, for that matter, most things), and you've probably gotten conflicting information from all the research that you've been making.

The surgeons undoubtedly explained the risks - and I can't tell your husband that his concerns are unrealistic - but the chances that he'll be fine, come out stronger, and feel better than he has in a long time are all good.

If they weren't, the surgery probably wouldn't have been suggested.

I'm sure that we'll all be pulling for you and your husband to do well next week.
 

Rainbow

Active member
Joined
Jun 24, 2019
Messages
27
Just an update. He is in theatre now. The surgeon is using a bovine replacement valve. Today also happens to be Appreciation of the Cow Day, so I'm told. I choosing to believe that's a good omen :)
 
Last edited:

Agian

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 10, 2013
Messages
2,236
Location
Adelaide, South Australia
He'll be out soon. Try not to be too anxious when you see him intubated. He'll be chatting in a little while.

'Appreciation of the Cow Day'. I hear that's a national holiday in NZ, with military parades and everything.
 

Warrick

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 27, 2015
Messages
504
Location
New Zealand
Yea Agian my favourite cow is mooochelle
:)

Hope everything went well Rainbow, Im guessing you wont see him awake until sometime tomorrow
 

Duffey

Me and Granbon
Joined
Sep 29, 2004
Messages
5,193
Location
Far side of the moon
Wishing you all the best and hope he is out soon. My husband has now been in surgery for five hours but they keep sending updates that all is well.
 

Seaton

Well-known member
Joined
May 13, 2015
Messages
316
Location
London, UK
Just an update. He is in theatre now. The surgeon is using a bovine replacement valve. Today also happens to be Appreciation of the Cow Day, so I'm told. I choosing to believe that's a good omen :)
All the best with the surgery and the days ahead!
 

pellicle

Professional Dingbat
Joined
Nov 4, 2012
Messages
6,468
Location
Queensland, OzTrayLeeYa
Wishing you all the best and hope he is out soon. My husband has now been in surgery for five hours but they keep sending updates that all is well.
Somehow I didn't know your husband was having surgery, I hope he had a smooth recovery and that you are doing well and keeping calm.

Best Wishes
 

Superbob

Steely Resolve!
Joined
Apr 21, 2005
Messages
8,225
Location
Coastal Carolina
WOW, just caught up with this thread! Very much hoping both Rainbow and Duffey can report good news to us very soon! Kudos to everyone here for all the supportive comments that have been made!
 

Rainbow

Active member
Joined
Jun 24, 2019
Messages
27
Phew! I am very happy to report that Tim's surgery went well yesterday. A few issues with low blood pressure meant he had to stay on the ventilator thingee till this morning but by this afternoon he was well enough to leave ICU and go back to the Ward. He is sleeping more than he is awake but they said that's ok. Tomorrow they will step down some of the attachments and get him up and moving. His main complaints are thirst and itchy skin - no pain unless he coughs. Trouble is water makes him cough so they have him on ice cold milk and it seems to be a lot better. He doesn't want food yet as he has had some nausea but thats ok. Tomorrow will be better I'm sure. Thank you all for your support and I hope your hubby is ok too Duffey xx
 
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