Musician2k concerns

shop deals on amazon
Advertise with us
Shop deals on ebay
Valve Replacement Forums

Help Support Valve Replacement Forums:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
musician2k

musician2k

Beloved Member
Joined
Apr 28, 2006
Messages
174
Location
Kokomo, Indiana, USA
I am writing on behalf of my husband Chris aka Musician 2k, which you are all very aware of had surgery on Tuesday and the complications that resulted. I am sorry that I keep posting to the board, but I really have some questions and concerns, and my hope is that someone there will be able to help me to understand this better.

Chris is not getting better. He has periods of extreme pain; they have put him back on morphine as well as another pain killer. Nothing seems to be working. He is so out of it. It?s really taken away his life, and it makes me worry that this wasn?t the right thing to do, yet what other choice did we have? It really hurts me to see him in this much pain and to have to leave him in the hospital many miles away from me. I feel so helpless. My question is this?.has anyone out there had problems after surgery? How long were you/someone you knew in the hospital? What happened? What worked? Didn't work? I just feel so alone and helpless. Perhaps, you could share something with me that might help me to understand. I really thought he would be home now, but now I am starting to worry that he may never come home!

Thanks so much for all that you have done for us already. Please continue to pray for Chris. This seems to be all that I can do.
Carla
 
Carla, please never apologize for posting- we have all been very concerned for you and Chris and checking in hourly to see if you have posted. Can you describe what kind of pain Chris is having - is it shoulder and back pain, incision pain or some other kind of pain? Have you discussed this with the surgeon and cardiologist? Our prayers and best wishes continue to go to both of you and we will always be here to try and help in any way we can.
 
Carla,
Know that we are here for you and worry right along with you.

When you say Chris is out of it do you know if this is because of the pain meds or is there some other issue? Have you discussed your concerns with the doctors? Is is very important to be very vocal with the doctors and staff to make sure they understand that you want to know everything that is happening.

Please try to keep in mind that he is still very early on in recovery. Yes, some members have been out of the hospital in a few days but, usually, it takes longer. Everyone is different and what works for one might not be what works for Chris.

I remember after my last OHS, I had visitors a few days after surgery. I was not able to talk to them, only laid in my bed and held my friend's hand. She was very worried about me because I was sure, before surgery, that I would be fine by then. Even my experience changed from each surgery. I remember wanting to talk to her and tried to will myself to be active but my body just didn't cooperate.

Pain does go away assuming there is nothing else going on like an infection. It is merely a matter of time. Of course it is hard right now for both you and Chris, especially since they don't seem to be able to find the right meds for him but this will pass. Have you tried massage or relaxation techniques with him? It might help some.

Please try not to get too discouraged as, I am sure you know, Chris needs you to be his rock right now. Let us be your rock and let us know what we can do.
 
I agree with Phyllis...don't ever apolgize for asking questions. That's what we're all here for. What level of communication does Chris (you) have with his team of doctors? I was told by Cleveland team to up my pain reading to nurses so I would always stay ahead of my pain...which I did. If I was a 5, I'd tell them, "oh I'm hurting, I'm definitely a 10." :rolleyes: One of those little white lies I will never feel bad about.
It's a matter of finding the right dose of the right meds, staying ahead of it and fighting til you get that much needed relief.
Chris is lucky to have you by his side. Don't be afraid to keep after the team until Chris is resting easy. I sure hope you get to bring him home soon and celebrate his birthday the right way! *happy birthday chris*
Debbi
 
Carla,
I will echo everything that Phyllis and Gina wrote. What is the source of the pain? If he is in a lot of pain, then I'm not surprised that he seems to not be making progress. Pain medication is supposed to take away the pain so the body is not having to fight it and use the energy with other aspects of the healing process. If he is on morphine and another pain med, he should be "out of it". I would think that at this point their main concern is to take care of the pain (hopefully knowing where it is coming from) and letting his body get some rest. I know it is very distressing for you to have to watch your husband go through this and feel like you can't do anything.

As Gina said, be very clear with the staff and doctors that you want to know everything. Do not hesitate to question. Do not hesitate to ask for a second or third opinion if one has not been sought. Don't worry about hurting people's feelings by questioning what they are doing. If you haven't yet, you may want to start keeping a journal of what is being done and what is being said as well as any and all questions you have. I'm sure you are emotionally and physically exhausted right now and the journal could help you collect your thoughts when speaking with "who ever".

Some people do not skate through this procedure. We have some members who seem to have a much easier time of it than others, and then we have some who have had the tough road that Chris is having now. I'm sure that you will get your Chris back, but with a stronger heart. As you said, it wasn't a choice between having it done and not having it done, so don't look back.

You and Chris and your family remain in my prayers.
 
We're all here for you!

We're all here for you!

Hi Carla,

Like the others said, please do not apologize for posting....we are here for you and for Chris anytime. Please feel free to ask questions, ask for support, etc. I can only imagine what you and Chris are going through. I, like the others, wonder what the surgeons says about his pain and what the cardiologist thinks is going on. Like the other said, ask questions, ask what's going on...why he's in so much pain...they are they to control the pain and keep him comfortable so that his body can start to heal. Please hang in there Carla...

So many hugs coming your way!!!!

Please keep posting and we'll do our best to help you out.
 
Hi Carla...

You wanna hear what can go wrong and that it gets better...
I am a Vr.com member who had a really bad turn after surgery I am pleased to report that I came good.

I had 3 cardiac arrests after my AVR and had a second surgery less than 1 hour after my first and ended up with a bypass. I was a very sick girl for 4 days while they kept me under an ice blanket and in a drug induced coma to lessen chances of brain injury, I was still on the vent too.

When I eventually got out of ICU(after 5 days there)., I was wondering what had I done to myself and why did I agree to this surgery. I couldnt get comfy and I wasnt "working" the pain meds properly.(you gotta take them before your last dose wears off) I couldnt walk and my hands were useless, very annoying. I spent alot of time sleeping it off...and ringing the buzzer for the nurse, or just lying there opening my eyes occaisionally when I had a visitor.

...I remember wondering how all the other VR.com members were able to do walking and physio stuff cos I sure couldnt manage anything like that yet.

Thankfully by day 8 or 9 it worked itself out. The pain did get much much better and I wasnt regretting my choice anymore. By day 10/11 I was allowed to go home. Now almost 3 months post-op I am practically back to normal....it was worth it in the end.

I know it was very hard on my mum and hubby to see me like this for over a week and then to wait on me hand and foot when I got home for probably the next 3 weeks as I was pretty weak and still feeling the doped-up effects of all those drugs.

I know your hubby will appreciate you being there by his side. I do hope he/they get his pain under control really really soon so he can rest and recover. That was tricky., trying to get comfy with all those tubes coming out of everywhere and if the sternum was aching/hurting it was hopeless...

Please keep asking us questions...we dont mind...thats why we are here...

Happy Birthday Chris for the 16th ...

I will be praying for you guys...take care and God Bless
 
Hi Carla. I'm so sorry that Chris is having these troubles. You are NOT alone! We are all here, waiting to hear from you, so feel free to ask us anything and vent any way you need/want to!

You also have a complete staff at a major hospital. Please use them. The others before have given you some great advice. You will feel much better if you get some clearer answers.

You probably also really need some rest! Poor you!! Please try to think of yourself some, too.

Some of us have a really easy time. But just as many, or more go through little slices of hell as they make this journey. Ultimately, statistics are in favor of his feeling SO MUCH BETTER in the long run. And, just having the "long run" is an important thing to remember!! These conditions must be taken seriously. So try to stay optimistic, please. We know it is tough. There will be light at the end of this tunnel. Hang in there.

Best wishes and many thoughts coming your way!

Marguerite
 
Don't give up!

Don't give up!

Carla,

I have just had my second anniv. after my surgery and I can tell you that as simple as it sounds............time heals!.........I was home for 2 months after my operation and I was in pain that at times made me feel sick to my very being. The doctors kept telling me to give my body a chance to heal and it sounded like a lot of crap to me but in reality that was as good advice as I was going to get.

Hang in there and knwo that everyone that has gone through this knows what you and Chris are dealing with and our prayers are with you both!

Be well!
Mark
 
Carla if it helps, I was in CSICU for 50 days. I had a very very tough time of it. I was out of it for most all of those 50 days too. I was told that I was literally in a vegetative state and they weren't at all sure I was going to make it. Chris' problems don't sound all that bad. It sounds like a pain issue and not much more. Of course, I'm only going off the info your providing too, but I think if they get his pain managed properly, you'll see a difference immediately or near so. It's very important for a family member to remain there and keep on the staff. It's amazing what happens the minute family is not there. Do the best you can and delegate time to other members and be his spokes person to those people.
 
I echo all the advice and encouragement already posted!
Take care of you, as I said before, make sure you are rested and nurished.. it helps with the clear head thinking process.

The pain needs managed. Mine was not managed, but then again i couldn't take any of the great narcotic pain meds.
There are many options out there, so stay on them to find the right one.
Make sure your questions get answered.

I used to leave a big list of questions on a white erase board for the team.
My husband would write them down throughout the day as we thought of them and then when they came in at 5am (who is awake enough for a discussion then?) they would read them and answer them.

Keep us posted, we are concerned and praying here.
 
I can't add anything to what everyone has said except that severe pain does make a patient appear in overall worse condition than they sometimes are. I hope that's the case. Just want to say I'm praying for Chris and hoping for a quick turnaround. God bless.

Wise
 
Bless your heart!

Bless your heart!

I am so sorry your husband is having such difficulties. I know you are worried, and I hope you have someone to support you and hold your hand through this. Hopefully this day will be a turning point! You and Chris are in my prayers!
 
Dear Carla - Thank you so much for posting. Like others have said, I am checking frequently to see if there is any news of Chris. I am so sorry that he is having such a rough time of it, and I can't even imagine how painful it must be for you to watch him going through this. Where will you find the strength to be stong for Chris? Somewhere it is there, deep inside you. Today I will keep holding a vision of Chris free from pain and his body healing and growing stronger. And you grounded and strong like an oak tree. Know that you are not alone, there is a world of love pouring toward you and Chris and all your loved ones. You can, and will, get through this!

Love,
Liz
 
Carla, I'm so sorry Chris is having such a difficult time. We tend to be breezy and optimistic for those about to undergo ohs; but those who've had tough hospitalizations & recoveries are always lurking in our minds.

First, I think you need to get yourself moved to Indianapolis for the duration (I believe that's where Chris had his surgery?). See if the hospital can provide a list or recommendation for an inexpensive motel (most have such places with arrangements for relatives of out-of-town patients). I presume from your post that you're driving back and forth - not a good thing.

Second, I agree with others that most of Chris's being "out of it" is related to his meds and this is a good thing. Hard for you, good for him. He doesn't want to remember this period of time.

And finally, NEVER feel that you're imposing on us by posting; any help we can provide, any prayers we can send winging, are why we participate in this forum.

And my best thoughts and prayers are coming your way. Please take care of yourself.
 
Carla, like everyone else, I was so hoping to hear that he was progressing, even slightly. I am sorry to hear that he is constantly fighting this post-op pain. As several of the other posters have mentioned, some people on this board breeze right through the operation while others don't. When you asked me last week if I had had post-op complications, I had told you about my pericardial effusion and having to go back up to Indy to have a reop to get that fluid out. I was out of it for awhile, although not with pain issues, more with breathing issues and a little bit of depression too. All I could think was that I was in OK shape before this operation (at least I convinced myself of that), but now I feel horrible. With Chris, it's going to be a day to day thing. Hopefully, and with all the good thoughts and prayers we are all sending your way, he will start feeling better soon. Please keep asking questions or venting, whichever you choose. That's what we're here for.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Latest posts

Back
Top