anxious and just plain scared

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sunshine2cats

sunshine2cats

Active member
Joined
Jun 19, 2014
Messages
42
Location
Waterloo, Ontario
am facing surgery for valve replacement , read Barbara Walters and saw that Fox , coach of Colorado football team had it done and are doing well although Fox fainted on the golf course. i want to have it done and over with but the negative talk has frightened me..am 70 , no high blood pressure and the valve is genetic . i see so many here are brave and are doing it...i want to have a cow valve..no problem but just am so damn scared.
 
Hi sunshine2cats. Being scared is to be expected but keep it in perspective. For every negative story you hear, there are thousands of positive stories. FWIW....I play golf three times a week and not fainted yet.
 
how old were you when u had the valve replacement? you look so well now....i see by the date it is in 2007. oh man...i think i will be crawling in to the hospital as i wake up shaking over the thoughts of being on that heart lung machine.
 
No, my surgery was in 1967...not 2007....when I was 31, am 78 now. Thanks for the compliment on my aging....it's in the genes. I remember nothing about the heart/lung machine...was sleeping like a baby LOL.
 
gosh that was a long time ago before advanced techniques too...and your still kicking ...i need an aortic valve replacement and put it off until the doctor said i was best to have it when i am in good condition...i can out walk anyone but the heart murmur and it is the valve is size of a pinhole.
 
thank you for your answer and uplifting words which i need. your so young but i am sure i can do it with postitive readings...i have cut out 2 friends so far because of their woeful predictions for me.
 
Hi

sunshine2cats said:
i have cut out 2 friends so far because of their woeful predictions for me.
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firstly I think you'll be fine. I can understand that it seems scary, but really, do not sit there focusing on the surgical technique if it is disturbing to you. Just accept that these teams of people have been doing this for ages.

Open Heart surgery is about the most successful surgical intervention in all of medicine. The reason is mainly that aside from some technical issues its just like putting a new valve on a leaky tap. The aortic valve is just a valve in a plumbing system.

I have had 3 surgeries over my life, and I am about 50 now.

Just focus instead on things like sorting out your recover and doing whats needed to put you back on track to being healthy again :)
 
sunshine2cats said:
i have cut out 2 friends so far because of their woeful predictions for me.
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When, before surgery for aortic valve replacement, I explained to my friends about it, I explained that without surgery I would be most definitley dead within two years. So the predictions without surgery are 100% woeful. You might want to put it like that to any friends voicing woeful predictions of surgery - yes it is major surgery which does carry its own risk and it's not a piece of cake, but the risk of not doing surgery is much greater !
 
You are allowed to feel how you feel and it is ok to prefer to have positive and encouraging people(friends) around as you await surgery. Do what is right for you to cope with this stressful time. Be sure to discuss your concerns/questions with your medical team.

Every one has their own comfort level, regarding the amount technical/medical information they require. Again, do what is right for you.!!

I am 4 weeks post op and am doing fine. :)

Helen
 
thanks Paleogirl , actually i have said some of what you suggested and i think it is best to avoid this couple of friends...who needs it at this time...i know that i must have it as it is about life and i looked at the odds and it was 2% for not working and that is damn good odds...i told my friends that driving down town is worse than that. you look so wonderful and if i an recover as well , i shall be happy...i am in the beginnings of the works.
 
Hi Sunshine , you don't live too far from me!!!! If you want the BEST place for surgery look into Gates Vascular Institute in Buffalo. All new state of the art place. Don't worry about your age I would say most patients there were over 65. The nurses were shocked to see me there at 49 years old. They let you know everything that will happen so there is no reason to be scared! - You will feel so much better after it's done!
 
Thank you Helen for your kind advice . am feeling better with the input of positive comments in here and will keep u posted as i have my tests and then surgery.
your doing fine and i cannot wait to get to that point. thanks again. Ruth
 
I think everyone here understands the being scared part. For me, I tried to be strong for my wife and kids. My faith in God is what really got me through it all. This forum is invaluable in what it provides in information. You will be fine, even at 70. You can look forward to more energy and a whole new outlook on life.
 
thanks for the support...i did read some of the hard stuff afterwards but now i know what to expect and i know how my aunt looked after so i expect to be out of it for a little while but to have more energy and a few more years , it will be worth it. thanks knotguilty for writing me.
 
For two weeks after I got my diagnosis I was so scared I couldn't see straight. I didn't know anyone that had been through this. Then I found this site and realized there were people all over the world who were right there with me! And they were people who knew exactly how I felt! That alone was enough to calm me down a lot. Spent a lot of time reading here and planning for my recovery at home. By the time my surgery day arrived I was looking forward to getting fixed, and went in surprisingly calm. I trusted my team completely. Enjoyed joking with the anesthesia folks and took pictures of all the medical people who would pose with me. I went to sleep, and then I woke up. Surgery was that easy! I grumbled about recovery, but it wasn't all that bad really. That was five weeks ago and I feel very good now.

This is a time to focus on you. Tell your friends and family what you need or want. And don't be embarrassed to ask anyone for help if you need it.
 
Blair said:
For two weeks after I got my diagnosis I was so scared I couldn't see straight. I didn't know anyone that had been through this. Then I found this site and realized there were people all over the world who were right there with me! And they were people who knew exactly how I felt! That alone was enough to calm me down a lot. Spent a lot of time reading here and planning for my recovery at home. By the time my surgery day arrived I was looking forward to getting fixed, and went in surprisingly calm. I trusted my team completely. Enjoyed joking with the anesthesia folks and took pictures of all the medical people who would pose with me. I went to sleep, and then I woke up. Surgery was that easy! I grumbled about recovery, but it wasn't all that bad really. That was five weeks ago and I feel very good now.

This is a time to focus on you. Tell your friends and family what you need or want. And don't be embarrassed to ask anyone for help if you need it.
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Here here !! a good cheerleader is always motivating ;)
 
thank you Blair , i really need all the help i can get and this is the only place that seems to be helping...some people love the drama and i hear stories that do not help me , i have moved on. i wake up shaking with the thoughts of it but calm down later...i am in the first stages...test on friday..see surgeon , then date and i hope i do not wait too long to get so anxious. i guess the one thing that bothers me with this operation is getting nauseated afterwards...i always have trouble with that...i can handle pain but not the sickness of the stomach..i know i will have contraptions all over the place,,,ready for that too. i cant wait to get it behind me and write in here about how i am doing . thanks again.
 
sunshine2cats said:
i guess the one thing that bothers me with this operation is getting nauseated afterwards...i always have trouble with that...i can handle pain but not the sickness of the stomach...
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You won't necessarily feel nauseated, they're very good at controlling that. I remember that at one point I felt like I might throw up but they immediately gave me an anti-emetic and I was fine. Everyone reacts differently, just let them know how you're feeling !
 
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