Have a date, any advice?

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Brookwood

Well-known member
Joined
May 7, 2008
Messages
48
Location
salt lake city, UT, USA
We met the surgeon last Wednsday and set a date for my husband's AVR. It's June 4th. My husband is 39. Our emotions are strong, but we are trying to focus on positive side and live one day at a time.

We still have 20 days to wait. What should we do to get prepared for the surgery? Any good advice? We haven't decided which type of valve to choose, so maybe that will take lots of time to think about.
 
I'm glad you have a date and I will put your husband on the calendar for June 4th. Wayne posted a good thread for what to take to the hospital. If you are still undecided about the valve, you will probably be spending a lot of time on the valve selection thread. There is a lot of good information there. The waiting is the hardest, but you both have a good attitude. Use this time to prepare the house and your own psyches and you will come through this fine. Wishing you the best!
 
I was told on a Thursday that it was time and that they could do it the following Monday.....fat chance:D....I had it scheduled for the following Monday...went to the beach that weekend and used the week prior to get some papers in order and instructions for my wife:rolleyes:....I was surprised at how calm, or numb I was going in but as soon as the cath was done they pretty much kept me on cloud nine:cool::D....All will be well...it is not as bad as you are both imagining.....I was 49 and did fine....you will too.
 
I had about 10 day advance notice of my surgery. I had already chosen a mechanical valve given my age (42) and my overwhelming hope that a mechanical valve will allow me to be one and done with OHS. In the days leading up to the surgery I made it a point to get my living will and power of attorney taken care of (that sucked). I also made it a point to have a big fat steak and an icey cold beer. Actually did that 3 times in 10 days. Other than that I simply tried to focus on what would happen post surgery and in my recovery. I also spent a good deal of time on here reading posts and getting reassurance from the wonderful VR community.

Best of luck, Im certain you will do very well.
 
Appreciate your response.

I guess the hardest part of waiting is when we think about "what if...". Today my husband told me about somethings I should know if... that made me so sad. I also have to explain the situation to our two small kids. I really don't want them to worry about their Dad.
 
One of the things I have learned is that you cannot fully focus on the positive thinking needed to recover if you have "unfinished business." It is important to have all the paperwork done, let people know where things are, express your fears and tell everyone you love them. These are all crucial steps to getting to that "calm" place that comes prior to surgery. Some of the steps can be bittersweet but the comfort of knowing all is well is priceless.

Wishing you the very best.
 
In addition to organisational matters and getting his head in shape, don't let your husband forget physical preparation. Enter hospital as fit as possible. This speeds and aids post op recovery. Don't sit around for 20 days, get some good long walks in, would be my advice. :)
 
Since you (collective) have not decided on a valve yet, I recommend looking over the Valve Selection Forum, staring with the "Sticky" at the top of the list of threads.

For mechanical valves, the technological advances offered by the relatively new (1996) On-X Valves appeal to my (engineering) mind. See www.onxvalves.com and www.heartvalvechoice.com for more information.

The St. Jude Masters Series mechanical valves have the longest track record for longevity (30 years and counting). See www.sjm.com for their website.

ATS and Carbomedics are spinoffs of the St. Jude Valves.

The Bovine Pericardial Tissue Valve has the longest record for durability (20 years and counting when implanted in patients over age 60 (or is it 65?)).

The Medtronics Freestyle Porcine Valve seems to have the Lowest (pressure) Gradient of the Tissue Valves.

Since your husband is an engineer, I expect he will enjoy sorting through the valve design parameters and comparing performance :) That should keep him busy while he waits for surgery!

'AL Capshaw'
 
I just got my date a few days ago and I am having my AVR on May 22nd. I have been obsessed with getting my house ready for when I return home. I am a single mom so my parents have been helping me and I think they will be glad when I consider my house to be "ready". I am kind of nesting like I did right before I had my daughter who is going to be eight soon. It is hard to explain it to kids but they handle things better than you think they will. My daughter did a heart walk with one of my friends and wore my name on her shirt to walk in support of me which really warmed my heart. She was given t-shirts and even a pedometer. Now she is focused on when I get home. She is going to take me for walks and keep track of how far I go each day and write it down. Having her focus on when I get home and not my surgery has calmed her almost completely.
The only major thing I purchased in prep was to get a lift chair which was suggested here by a few people. I lucked out and bought one at a garage sale but you can rent them too. I will be by myself quite a bit so I wanted the securtiy of being able to get up easily by myself. The sticky note on what to get before and after will help alot. I just bought extra bed pillows yesterday. Choosing a valve is probably the toughest part and will require alot of reading on your part. I knew what I wanted and when I talked to my surgeon he had choosen the same valve for me as well. Good luck with everything and enjoy your time before the surgery.
 
Brookwood, your husband is young and the odds are overwhelming in favor of a wonderful outcome. I would recommend a book to you that helped my wife and children understand what the surgery and recovery would be like. This understanding calmed them as they realized that the succcess rate of surgery is very high -- particularly the younger and healtier you are.

The name of the book is "The Patient's Guide To Heart Valve Surgery", written by Adam Pick. His web site address is: [email protected]. You can get the book by mail or you can download if you want it immediately. Pick's recovery was a little longer than mine but all are different. I had my AVR 4 weeks and today I am beginning slowly getting back to work. The absolute worst thing about the surgery was the IV port that was placed before surgery -- I just don't like needles. The drugs are great and the bad parts are not remembered.

I got my affairs in order before the surgery as your husband is doing and that caused my wife some sadness. Even though the doctor told me that there was only a 1% opportunity for bad to happen I wanted everything in order to make it easier on my wife. Also, it helped me to prepare for surgery.

The very best of luck to your husband and I will remember him in my prayers.

Dan
 
Thank you all for your advice. This wonderful VR community really gives us lots of understanding, encouragement and reassurance which we desperately need now. I'm so thankful that there are so many loving and caring people here.

Yes, my husband is an engineer, and he is sorting through different kinds of valves and is amazed by the design of On-X. He explained a bunch of mechanical stuff about On-X to me and said how smart it is. :) But our surgeon is a little conservative and we are not sure if he has implanted any before. My husband's another problem is his reactive arthritis and NSAIDs he is taking now. The surgeon seemed not bothered by this. We will meet him to discuss those issues next week. Maybe we also need to consult with a hematologist or cardiaologist.

I will explore all the information resouces you recommended. Thanks for your good wishes and prayers.

JodyC, I will remember you in my prayers. Good luck and best wishes!
 
I guarantee you this will be the fastest 20 days in ur life. But, the slowest after the surgery. You?ll find the Community members here in the forum will assistance you anyway they can, which usually takes the pressure off. I had 17 days notice and lived it up. My visa card decided to take me on a trip, got married, had the best BBQ steak and baby back ribs, had an awesome party
 
duncanjo said:
I guarantee you this will be the fastest 20 days in ur life. But, the slowest after the surgery. You?ll find the Community members here in the forum will assistance you anyway they can, which usually takes the pressure off. I had 17 days notice and lived it up. My visa card decided to take me on a trip, got married, had the best BBQ steak and baby back ribs, had an awesome party
Click to expand...

Wheres the beer? :(
 
Several of our members have been "First Time On-X recipients" for their surgeons.

On-X is happy to have a representative meet with the surgeon to show their valves, how to do the 'sizing' (which is somewhat different from the sizing techniques for older valves), and go over their recommended 'stitching / tacking' process.

Contact Catheran Burnett, RN who is the Manager of Education and Promotion for On-X. She can tell you what surgeons in your area have used On-X before or arrange for a company representative to meet your surgeon.

Her contact information is [email protected] or 888-339-8000 ext. 265

'AL Capshaw'

p.s. I'm not surprised that your engineer husband is impressed by the On-X design.
 
Im 42 and had my replacement 3 months ago, its a real personal decision on
whether to go tissue or mechanical . I think it was Ross who said that the
choice is the most difficult for those of us around 40... on one hand you dont
want to be stuck on coumadin for 30 or more years but you also dont want multiple surgeries:confused:I chose tissue but only b/c I have problems with coumadin-though most people are fine with it.Also , supposedly, the tissue
valves dont lst as long on the young, but they now chemically pretreat these
valves to make them last longer.
Best Wishes To You:)
 
Brookwood said:
Yes, my husband is an engineer, and he is sorting through different kinds of valves and is amazed by the design of On-X. He explained a bunch of mechanical stuff about On-X to me and said how smart it is. :)
Click to expand...

A friend of mine is also an engineer awaiting valve replacement. I'll quote from a recent message to me, as he has a quirky sense of humour :D

Funny you should mention that. Being a good engineer I did ask whether there was anything else that needed doing whilst access had been gained. He will have to remove some of the thirty-seven years worth of fatty deposits, but couldn't think of anything else that needed doing!

I tried to have a discussion about the shock-waves that will result from a mechanical valve closing, but there appeared to be little interest in the medical world...
 
One thing to add to all the good advice above--it sort of contradicts 'one day at a time', but I think it's a good idea to make a plan for an enjoyable family getaway a 2-3 months post-surgery. It moves your mental horizon beyond surgery day. After all, getting on with your life is the most likely outcome!
 
Yes, the hardest part is the WAIT! I remember waiting 8-months before I had my 1st OHS! That was agonizingly long!

You will be in my prayers! I'm sure you will do great & will be back home soon.

Best wishes to you! :)
 
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