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Thanks so much
Thanks so much
I already feel better knowing I'm not alone.
My primary care physician (the one who diagnosed the endocarditis that got me into this whole mess
)put me on Zoloft a week and a half ago. I'm hoping it will help me get my attitude back on track.
Thanks for all the support and encouragement! John, I'll do the search. I actually live in Dickinson, but had my surgery in Bismarck. From the smiley face I'm guessing you have good memories of Bismarck.
Mary
The Caboose??
The Caboose??
Well, I sort of feel like a Johnny Come Lately on this post now--wow three pages. But it is a good one--thread that is. Yes, I certainly do feel as if I have been changed by the surgery--AOV due to bicuspid valve. I agree with Rain 100%--no one truly understands who hasn't been there, so I don't talk about it generally speaking. On one hand while I think I am more understanding, more mellow, I also feel as if I have to "prove" myself. Due to work and other concerns, I probably stress far more than I should, but none of these things would have affected me in the same way had I not had the heart situation and surgery. So I don't think I stress any more than I would have otherwise, but am just more conscious of it. I am also far more aware of "happy" and what that means to me and what can I truly DO to make every day count. Like most, I work long hours and don't have time for the volunteer work I would love to do. Before the surgery I didn't consciously think of these things, but now it is like "time" is a precious commodity. It has been 4 years since my AOV surgery. While I still wrestle with dr appts and echos, coumadin clinic and lab tests, occasional fatigue and SOB, it's as if family has forgotten it ever happened so sometimes I almost forget--then my chest "thumps"! That's another thing to get used to--having an artificial valve is simply "not normal" and I am far more in tune with my body and what it needs than I ever thought before. My faith in God got me through the whole thing and sustains me now. But that doesn't stop me from having various concerns about the future. So perhaps I am more contemplative as well. The scar--well, bothered me a little at first, like the "new car ding" as someone stated. Now it is a badge of honor 4 yrs hence--part of my experience and thus who I am. Gee, I hope that all makes sense--sometimes when I wax philosophical, I don't know when to quit! Peace to you all! Susan
