frustrated and scared

[annie10]

Hello everyone! I first visited here in January 2000, before my AVR. It is a wonderful place for support and inspiration! After my surgery and recovery I returned to work, got busy and drifted away. (I was more of an observer than a participant). Well, I am back in the waiting room, with an aortic aneurysm this time. I will skip all the boring details about how I got to where I am now--but I have been to the Cleveland Clinic and am waiting for their verdict on surgery timing. They have to get the operative notes from my AVR to see exactly what the surgeon did to "repair" an aneurysm I had at that time. Surprise! I guess that will determine how long I must balance on this tightrope without a net... I am someone who doesn't want to "watch and wait" with my fingers crossed that I don't rupture or dissect...
I want to FIX IT! As much as I dread the thought of another OHS I dread the uncertainty even more!! I am trying to function normally, but not only is there an elephant in the room, he's sitting on my chest! Goodness-- tightrope, elephant...maybe I should join the circus!
My poor daughter has started having panic attacks...and I'm too frazzled myself to be any help to her
Thanks everyone for being here.

 

[Ozmercy]

focus

focus

Annie,
I know you are in a scary place i just got out of that nightmare, but take it from a reformed worrier none of your scary thoughts will help you. Focus on what's next to be done and focus on the goal, a positive succesful surgery. I know you will get through this! When I was really feeling bad I spent time listening to positive worship music and praying. Not for me, but for my family and others. Trying to keep my focus on helping others, kept my temptation to worry away. I hope that is a little helpful. I know what you are feeling and it is legitmate place to have anxiety, but let it go, it doesn't help. I use to write down my concerns than pray about the things on my paper and then I would wrinkle up the paper and throw it away and say there it is, it's in God's hand now. I will pray for you and know that everyone here is pulling for you.

Randy

 

[BDMc]

Dear Annie,

Dear Annie,

What a bummer! I am with you on the "Fix it"! I can totally relate to that feeling! It's great that you have the best hospital. I hope that gives you some reassurance and comfort. I wonder if your daughter would find some comfort here? I know she'd be welcome! It is so scary going through these things! Sounds like you are pursuing the right stuff with the docs. Try to focus on that, and the love of your family and friends. Brian

 

[geebee]

Annie,
Sorry to hear of your newest problem. One OHS is enough in a lifetime, more than one really sucks.
I hope you get the surgery answer soon and can get all this behind you.
Let us know how we can help.