Ross, I don't know if this form is a good place to vent or even if it's allowed but I will anyway. You can trim and cut if you need. This will pretty random because my mind is bouncing from the surgery to my life and my family.
Well! Today is the day. It's now 3:30 a.m. My wife is sound asleep. I'm glad because it will be alonger day for her than for me. I did doze a couple hours and I know in a few hours I will be totally out of it.
The Pre-op "training" was interesting, but as DEBBYA said and many others have said or thought, "i'm glad I already knew that". I made my final decision to go mechanical. I think my wife was/is relieved. My daughter was happy with that decision. I finished up my chest x-ray, EKG, and blood work and I've had no calls from the hospital saying there's a problem so I must be good to go.
I can safely say I'm not terrified, just scared to death. I don't think the thought of mortality is a big factor but the idea of a stroke or other major problem in surgery does. My dad had a stroke in the late 60's and his thought processes were fine. But he was partially paralized and his speech was impaired. I'm am active like he was and the thought of being held hostage in a "damaged" body is truly scary. I have my Lord to look to but I'm only human and I am fearful.
I did talk to my Pasor last afternoon and he prayed with me over the phone. He said he would be at the hospital when I go in. It is a comfort that he cares and even more that He cares. Our pastor has only been at the church for about 8 weeks and he's relatively young, about 4, but I feel pretty comfortable around him and he is a man of God.
I'm going to cut it here. My son will try later to log on for me to update this during and after surgery today.
Thanks to all of you for your support. I'll be back in a couple days.
