What VR Means To Me

[BDMc]

This has been a tough week here. Losing Tbone is painful, and hard to come to grips with for me. He was a wonderful, generous presence here despite his own suffering. There are at least a dozen others here, that I see doing this day after day, and there is wonderful new blood amongst us all the time, (I loved Mentu's post in the thread to Ross). I had my valve replaced in 1984, yet this community has become a vital haven for me all these years later. In the time I have been here, I have found great comfort just reading the replies to posts. I take comfort in knowing others are getting the information, and support they need. In the battles that we all face in our lives, it is very reassuring to know people care, and are there for us! I am most often a lurker, and rarely reply to the new members. I can see they are getting what they need from the veterans. So many of you are real treasures! I missed Mary leaving, but read Dennis' farewell. Thankfully I have contact with them through Facebook, as they have become real friends. It is a real blow to me to lose their presence here. Can't we do better at keeping the living? Brian

 

[BDMc]

There is another service/purpose some of you serve for me. So many here face their personal battles as best they can. They suffer greatly every day, yet their presence here is so generous! Some of you have really demonstrated who you are in what you have written here. Ross, Glenda, Nancy, Marguerite, Gina, Terry++++ you are my champions. I rejoice in your victories, and I stand with you in your fight! There is a real connection we sometimes make here, a priceless one of spirit. That is what really brings me back.

 

[zipper2]

OOhhhh Brian very nicely said i cant add anything more
very beautifully said from the heart

 

[Lionheart]

Well said Brian.

This site means a lot to me too and has helped me become educated and comforted. There are probably many other lurkers that we do not know about who gain from the insight and contributions of the incredible people on this site. Unfortunately, we slight those looking for help when we fall to petty disagreements. We should all seek to expose our similarities rather than debate our differences.

Thank you.
John

 

[Marguerite53]

Well said Brian.

This site means a lot to me too and has helped me become educated and comforted. There are probably many other lurkers that we do not know about who gain from the insight and contributions of the incredible people on this site. Unfortunately, we slight those looking for help when we fall to petty disagreements. We should all seek to expose our similarities rather than debate our differences.

Thank you.
John

I really like what John said... in response to Brian's wonderful observations.

I'm sorry that we might be losing people to Facebook. I do understand its allure, though. I have 3 children in their 20's and that is how they communicate with so many of their friends around the country (even around the world, I think) One child, though, found that too many people were asking to "friend" him and these were people he really did not want to be friends with but whom he did not want to offend, either, (lest there be repercussions with mutual friends). So it all seemed like grade-school playground stuff to him and he closed his account!! Even so, Facebook does sound like fun -- I just know I would spend way too much time there so I have avoided it.

I see my time on VR as a yin-yang kind of outreach/community service. I have certain needs; I come here. I pop on to watch how others are feeling and try to relate, console, direct, empathize. I use as much care, here, as I would if I were volunteering in my physical community.

Change is the only thing that's constant, right? So we need to accept the malleability of this site. But hopefully, we can keep it going. I think it is a true and valuable and uniquely special place.

Brian, I'm sorry that you are hurting so over the loss of TBone. It is so difficult to lose any members here, but one with whom you've made warm connections, it is especially hard.

Best wishes.

Marguerite

 

[hensylee]

what lovely posts here. It is really a compliment to members to hear these words. Sometimes members might think their posts are not reaching anyone at all. Never believe that. Everyone has a place here and something valuable to share. Thank you, Brian for reminding us. Blessins........

 

[briansmom]

I have said it before, but I know you can't say it too often - THANK YOU to all of you who have given me advice, comfort and prayers. I truly don't know how I would have survived (am surviving?) my son's health issues without this site. This is one of the few places that I don't have to always be the strong one.

 

[Glenda]

Brian your post brought tears to my eyes. You have such a good heart and these words came directly from your heart. "THANK YOU" for being you. We forget to "thank" those who have become to mean so much to us even though we've never met them in person. There are so many that I can't begin to list all of them. I miss those that have left. I have friends who want me to join Facebook but it's not for me. I have enough trouble just keeping up with my dear friends on this form, my leukemia forum and my e-mails. I've had a very rough last three days af work, Brian your post is just what I needed. Hugs coming your way and bless you! !

 

[gijanet]

Beautifully said...................

Beautifully said...................

What a great thread. Great minds think alike. See my post here. Scroll all the way to the bottom.
http://www.valvereplacement.com/forums/showthread.php?t=32510&page=2

Many hugs. Janet

 

[Danny]

I dont think i could go through this without you guys. Thanks

 

[hall]

It's funny this thread should come up now.......this past weekend we were with friends of ours and I was telling them about T-Bone. They starting telling me I should not be on this site and I should be over this "heart thing" ect. I can not print what I blew up and said. Let's just say the subject was dropped. People don't get it! We all get it here. I had been thinking ever since the weekend what the forum does mean. I am not sure if I will ever meet any of you or not. I feel as though I know many of you. I did not find this site until after AVR but I learned SO much since then. What little I do remember I will share. Yes, we are a second family for sure. I am very grateful to Hank and Ross and everyone on here. Thank You.

 

[Eva]

....... People don't get it! We all get it here.

....... I am not sure if I will ever meet any of you or not. I feel as though I know many of you. I did not find this site until after AVR but I learned SO much since then. What little I do remember I will share. Yes, we are a second family for sure. I am very grateful to Hank and Ross and everyone on here. Thank You.

T-Bone's passing away affected me a lot and when I mentioned it to some friends, their reaction was similar to Deb's that I should stop reading the Forum!!!
How wrong they are...I feel at a loss the day I do not open the Forum...I maynot, always, respond to threads or posts, yet I read them and I send a prayer and good wishes in my heart to those who need it.

This forum is a 'blessing'. I found it just before my surgery, yet it has become an important part of my life and knowledge.

Thanks again to Hanks for founding it and to Ross and to all.

 

[kschul]

This forum has been a God send. I had stumbled on this site a few months before my surgery and at that time there were four of us who were all in our 20-30's who were having very similar surgeries with the same surgeon all within about two months of each other. (what is the chances of that) I haven't seen anything like it again since I've been viewing the forum post-surgery. I think God sent us all to the same place at the same time to help us get through this. I have been stopping in to look/chat just because I feel so much better afterwards. Everyone has been very helpful and kind. Thank you everyone.

 

[Kathy McCain]

Brian, Thank you so very much for that emotionally felt post. I am truly sorry about T-bone!

I discovered this forum just a few weeks before my AVR. I can't begin to tell you just what the forum has meant to me! To be more specific, it's every individual on this forum. Even though I have never met any of you in person, and may never meet you, I feel like you are all my close friends. We all share the same life changing (and giving) experience. I believe, in that sense, we are like a very large extended family. We may not always agree on everything, but when push comes to shove, we are there for each other, to help and support each other.

I feel tremendously blessed to have discovered this forum. Hopefully we will all continue to help and support one another. Oh, I almost forgot! What about all the laughs? I've had numerous (too many to count) belly laughs too! That certainly helps to lift my spirits, when I'm having a bad day.

Luv you all!

 

[terryj]

I did not find this site until after my husbands AVR on 9/11/01 and I am so glad to have you all here to lean on and to hopefully help someone when they need help. I reference this site at least once a week when talking to my friends. My husband means everthing to me and I feel this site is my way of keeping him safer. I can always come here with questions and corncerns and know someone will reply. You have also been here for me over the past 7 years for personal tragedies. When we retire next year I hope to attend the reunions and put a face with the names. I love you all and this site.