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Khirsa

My 81 year old grandmother had valve replacement surgery 2 weeks ago. She is not walking the prescribed 10 minutes 3x a day. Will not go outside, refuses to eat most things, and will not do her breathing exercises. Surprising enough she seems to be getting along quite well. What can I do to encourage her to do the things the DR. has ordered. When ever I suggest anything, she says she is too old and doesn't want to. This coming from a woman that has never said "no I won't" in her life! I fear that here recovery will be extentended if she doesn't do these things now. Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated.

Jamie
 
Hi Jamie and welcome to VR.
It sounds like she is in a depression. It's common. All you can do is get her to try and if she keeps refusing, let the Doc know it. She has to do these things whether she wants to or not. She cannot give up now. She has gone through major surgery and I've just come home less then 3 weeks ago from a very difficult time. I went in on July 22 and got out of ICU on Sept 9 and out of the hospital on Sept 20th. I know how she feels. Please do what ever you have to in order to get her to cooperate. It won't be easy and she may be upset with you, but it must be done or she'll give up completely. I nearly did myself. It is frustrating, but if she doesn't do something to keep her muscles toned, she'll be in real trouble very quickly.

If there is anything else you need, we will try like mad to help you!

Ross
 
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Well, Bless her heart.

This surgery will "take it out of you". I am not sure I have any answers but somebody will, you can be sure of that. I am not a doctor so my advice is only cheap and or questionable value compared to those folks.

This has been an attack on her whole body. Food doesn't taste as good to most of us. Exercise and breathing/coughing hurts and is scary knowing the breast bone has been sawed open. The bowels don't work like they should and in many ways this thing leaves us a little down.

If she is doing fine I would not harp at her about doing things. Try to prepare foods that are easy to eat and hard to turn down. Make things she loves.

Just walking around indoors a little many times during tje day and doing a little more each day helps build strength and endurance. Is she taking the pain meds so the breathing etc do not hurt too much? I got discouraged with the breathing exercises per se and never seem to get back to where I was even right after surgery (3 1/2 weeks ago) so as long as her lungs are clear and she is not having difficutly breathing, I don't know that it is worth worring about. Let he do as much as she can for herself. She probably feels she has lost some independence due to the need for assistance following this surgery.

Sounds like a mild depression and she will probably snap out of it with mild encouragement and just generally feeling better each day. Be there for her and if she does not continue to improve, then maybe you will need to talk with her doc.

Tell her there are a lot of people here on this web site that will be praying for her and a speedy recovery. Our thoughts go to you also, since we know how hard it is being on the sidelines during all of this.

Welcome to the site, come back often.

Best of luck to you all

Bill
 
There you go, while I was composing my post, good ole Ross got there with the good advice. He knows of what he speaks. He is the Miracle Man of the web site. Acturally he probably feels about 101 years after this summer.

Bye for now,

B
 
Khirsa - It is great to hear your grandmother made it through surgery and is recuperating well, even at age 81. I had just one suggestion. Ask her to walk 5 minutes 3 times a day, all indoors. She recently went through surgery, but will compromise with you if you push. The exercise will probably increase her appetite. Hope this helps and she continues good recovery.
 
Jamie - a wee early to be pushin your grandmother. She will go but she's tired now, she's recuperating and I bet she does SOME walking (around the house to the bathroom, kitchen, bedroom) and that's better than none at all. I think that instead of you pushing her, perhaps it's better that her dr do it. Is home physical therapy available to her. My mother had severe surgery in her late 80's (not heart) and one of the things the dr rxed for her was physical therapy at home - covered by insurance, too. My mother did all the therapy with the fella - and when his time was done, she refused to do it anymore, even tho I tried to do it with her. But at least she had some benefits from it and he was with her several times a week for several months. Maybe the dr will help you out here. Also as others have said, for some reason unknown to us heart patients tend to be depressed, especially after surgery. And there's medicine for that. God bless
 
Hi Jamie,

Sorry to hear your grandmother is having a rough time of it.

How is she sleeping? If she is having trouble getting comfortable, a recliner or Body Pillow might help make her more comfortable.

It is not uncommon for foods to not be appealing for a few weeks. Hopefully this will change soon.

There are a lot of benefits to regular walking...

It is the BEST way to restore muscle tone and energy,
it helps flush out residual anesthesia and medicines,
it can relieve depression.

The breathing exercises can be trying, boring, and somewhat difficult. If her lungs are filled out, wonderful. If not, she *really* needs to work the spirometer as much as possible. I developed a mild case of pneumonia 3 weeks after bypass surgery a few years ago and had a lot of lung / chest wall 'difficulties' after my valve replacement this summer. The breathing exercises minimize and may even prevent these difficulties. Hopefully someone can get this message through to her in a way that motivates her.

Good Luck,

'AL'
 
If your grandmother is anything like mine she is very determined to do things her way. Encourage her to do what she needs to but at the same time try not to be too over protective. I know that after my surgery I could not do anything for my self, not even open a carton of milk. I am just 38 so I can totally understand how tired she is and how hard recovery will be for her. Please also remember that dealing with someone her age is kind of like dealing with a child and that they can be just as fragile at times.
Before I was a teacher, I was a nurse for 16 yrs.
Good luck and don't give up. Just push her a little bit every day.

Lettitia
 
Thanks so much for everyone's help. She is doing well, still not too active but will start cardiac rehab next Thursday. The Doc said at that time she will be getting the exercise she needs. I will update as things change. Thanks again! Jamie;)
 
Jamie,
I know exactly how your grandmother feels. It has been 4 1/2 weeks since my value replacement surgery. In the hospital the nurses would make me walk 6 times a day and at the time I hated them for it , now I am glad because I feel soooo much better and I know that they really did know what they were doing, even if they have never had the surgery. Let her know that she will feel better if she will start walking, it is a garentee !!! I think and know fist hand the anesthia kind of changes your personality for a while and puts you in a depression. Even to get her to sit outsite in the sun will do her good and she might start feeling better.

Faye in Idaho
 
Looks like you've received some excellent advice from the people here. I agree - your grandmother will do things in her own time. Is it possible that you walk with her? Sounds like you are there to care for her...maybe she feels unsure on her feet just yet and you need to walk w/her. I'm sure you're already doing that, though. Food won't taste good for several weeks. I lost 11 pounds, but somehow the pounds found me again......food will eventually taste good again. Valve surgery really takes it out of you. My surgery was 8/23/02 and I'm 48 yrs old and I'm still not 100% and people tell me I won't be for months......best of luck to you and your grandmother. She is so lucky to have you there caring for her. My husband left clients hanging to be home with me for 2 weeks after my surgery. I couldn't have done it w/out him to encourage me and love me through it all. I know your grandmother appreciates you there. Be patient yet encouraging. She'll come around....
 
Faye

Faye

Hey, Faye!!! So you made it over to this board too, huh? Good to see you. :) Hope you're doing well today. I was just about to write an email to you. :D
 
Welcome Faye!

Welcome Faye!

Hi Faye,
Noticed you're new here, so welcome! I think you'll find lots of interesting folks here with a wealth of experience...all willing to share.

I do have to tease you about something you typed:
It has been 4 1/2 weeks since my value replacement surgery.
Click to expand...

Where can I get that kind of surgery? My values could certainly use some replacing! Then I wouldn't be teasing new members!


John
 
Hello Faye and welcome to a wonderful place. In no time at all, it will feel like home. My husband, Tyce is now almost 4 months post op and clicking right along. Again, welcome, welcome, welcome!!

Evelyn
 
Welcome Faye

Welcome Faye

See you live in Idaho..Do you have someplace to walk inside..believe me..KEEP walking..everyday..push yourself..It will take several more months to feel really good. I am at 6 months..gained my weight back..got lazy but started walking again..Our weather here in North Georgia is getting cool. We have a basketball gym inside our gated community. Think I'll get the key from guard and walk inside there this winter. Walmart too far away. Welcome and ask questions about recovery anytime. Bonnie
 
Hi Faye-

Welcome to this terrific site. You have lots of built-in friends here who understand what you've been through.

Hope to see you here often.

Take care.
 
Thank you to all the welcomes !! Today is actually been 5 weeks. I had surgery on the 13th of September to replace Mirtal value with St. Jude 25mm, disection of arota and repair of arotic value. I had my surgery at the Mayo in Minnesota by a pediatric surgen Dr. Puga and cardio. Dr. Warnes. I was just wondering when did everyone feel like themselves again? I did return to work this week because I was going stir crazy :D
It has been so great to know other people have gone through the same thing with all the same feelings !!! Thanks you agian !!!
FAYE in Idaho
 
Feel good again?

Feel good again?

Or feel like old self:) I'll be honest with you , Faye....I think 6 months to feel like old self.:) :) I see by your User ID..You are on Coumadin. Are you having any issues with taking it..like..Are you in range?..Have you read all of the threads on Home testing with your own Protime?......I cannot stress that walking a lot really helps..gets that nasty stuff:eek: :eek: out of your body..Clears your head:D :D You are only 6 weeks..Try not to get depressed because you will feel better everyday...:) :) Bonnie
 
Jaime

Jaime

Anything new on your grandmother. When you first posted, she had just got home. Recovery is never easy in the first few weeks. It is hard to get in and out of bed. Pain in the chest from the incision is uncomfortable. And sometimes it feels easier just to sit in the chair. And I agree with the depression could also factor in also. No two people recover from bypass surgery the same way. It takes time. I may be younger, but it is still not easy to bounce back from the shock to the body. I have been through two double bypasses in my life. So please be patient, if she is still not walking now, talk with her doctor about a referal. She may need a little for now. Take care.

Caroline
09-13-01
Aortic valve replacement
St, Jude's valve
 
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