home care

[bigsky25]

hi this is ed, can anyone tell me about when you first get home, do you need around the clock care, my wife works, will i be able to stay home alone during the day how hard will it be for me to get around do i need help with every move i make. will i need a nurse during my first week or so home. i value my time alone and would prefer it remained that way. any input on this subject would be appreciated

 

[Granbonny]

Care

Care

Ed..A lot of questions..Where will you be sleeping, resting, napping..How far to kitchen to walk and get juice ..snack...Meds???Meds need to be in a pill container with time of day for each one..Could you remember to take them??You will be walking very slowly..Could your wife take off at least the first week..or arrange for friends to sit with you the first week...You will sleep a lot..When is your surgery? We will be here for you..Bonnie

 

[Nancy]

Hi Ed-

You will need someone there for probably the first two weeks, at least. You will be very weak, tired and sore and will be on pain medications. Someone should be there to keep an eye on you as you move about, to prepare meals for you and to check on you as you do daily things such as showering and dressing yourself. You won't be able to drive for quite a while and if there are appointments with the doctors, someone will have to drive you there. You will also be asked to walk a lot and will feel much more comfortable at first, if someone accompanies you. Your medications will be changing frequently and you will need time to adjust to each medication, plus it takes time for the effects of anesthesia to be gone from your system. Even though you value your time alone, you will be grateful to have someone there for you. It doesn't really have to be a nurse, it could be another family member or a friend.

I've seen my husband through many surgeries, and have found this to be the case every time.

There are others here who have had different experiences. Each person reacts differently after surgery.

Do we have a surgery date for you yet? I guess I haven't checked the calendar recently.

 

[ALCapshaw]

Hello Ed,

My surgeon recommended that I have a companion for 24 hours a day for the first two weeks. I had planned for only one week and added 'visits' from friends to help out a little during the second week.

You DEFINITELY don't want to go it alone for the first week and I agree, two weeks is better if you can arrange for it.

'AL'

 

[Bill Hall]

Ed - My wife stayed home with me for several weeks, however I was pretty capable. I think you should definitely have someone that you could call and help you if needed and get there pretty quick. You should definitely have somone cook for you. Otherwise, I don't think you need a nurse or someone full time.

 

[JenniferO]

Ed, the hospital tries to put you in a position to do basic care for yourself by discharge. But you are weak and easily tired. My husband was with me for the first week; the second week he went back to work. You will be moving very slowly for at least the first two weeks and you need to be careful not to strain to pick up too much weight, etc. I would say the first week post-op it is essential to have someone there 24 hours and your wife should schedule to take vacation or whatever leave she can during that time; the second week it would be good if someone were there half-time, but if not, you can manage. You just need to have the essentials - medication, food, drink, bathroom - within easy reach so you don't create major exertion to get them, but you're not helpless. You'll be walking around the first week and the second week is not unmanageable on your own. You'll sleep a lot to recover from any activity and the rest of the time you'll be lounging in your recliner. That second week, I would get up and get showered and dressed and take a nap. About 11 o'clock I'd take a walk up the street for about 30 minutes and then come home and nap two hours to recover. Then I'd watch TV or read for an hour and take another nap. You don't do much at that point except rest between short periods of trying to be normal.

 

[Simon Gee]

help - you'll need it!

help - you'll need it!

Hi Ed,

don't even think about being alone for at least the first week after getting home as you will feel very weak and incapable, and even simple tasks will take considerable effort.

Like you, I value my own space but, boy, was I glad to have my wife and family around me when I first came home. I found sleeoping at night very uncomfortable, and so dozed a great deal during the day. It was so comforting to have someone about to prepare food and drinks or ensure I took my medicine.

As for your own space, you'll need to get walking as soon as you can, that was time on my own that I really enjoyed. And what better than to get home to someone you love and report some little achievement you've made while out walking!

Best regards,

Simon

 

[John Cochran]

I'm 8 weeks post op and doing great, but I absolutely agree the two weeks is kind of the magic number for needing someone around. However, even the first day home I could do basic things for myself, but got really tired doing them. Your memory and attention span may stink for a while, and your judgement also might be affected. After two weeks, though, you are enough better that you can be home during the day alone without too much difficulty.

Best of luck,
--John

 

[ALCapshaw]

Ed,

One more comment.

Since your wife works and presumably has limited time she can take off from work, it would be BETTER to have her take as much Off Time during your first week at home than to sit around the hospital. You will have lots of close scrutiny and support from the nursing staff while in the hospital.

Do you have other family members of friends who can pitch in?

I arranged for my sister to come help during my stay in the hospital (which ended up being 8 days due to some minor complications and the fact that I went out of town) and my brother came to stay for the following week when I went home.

'AL'

 

[hensylee]

I stayed with my nurse cousin for the first month after bypass. She and her husband like to sleep LATE and I like to get up very early - beside hurting makes you want to move a bit. I was in hospital for 6 days so had a pretty good start and I think the first day I was with them I got up early and made the coffee, read the paper, etc. They were ALWAYS in close range so if I needed, I could call. Never took a shower without my cousin near. She made me walk outside early on, but she was holding my elbow. I did my exercises on the porch several times a day while she sat near, but within a few days she could stay inside (within hearing). You will be able to make a determination as to how you are getting on, but if you decide to be by yourself, you need someone checking on you all the time because you will be very weak. I recommend that someone be in the house for at least a few days. After that, I was helping a bit with minor house stuff, to the chagrin of my dear cousin. God bless

 

[JJGo]

Hi Ed,

I'll give you the perspective from my end of the spectrum that turned out to be the absolute best case scenario, I think. I think what any individual needs is very different from person to person. I also think it makes a huge difference how healthy or symptamatic you are going in to surgery.

I was having my surgery exactly 2 weeks ago right now! My docs said I was "way ahead of the curve" with my recovery and they sent me home from the hospital after 4 and a half days because there was nothing to do for me there since I was doing so well. It did feel a little scary to go home early and give up the medical attention even if they thought I didn't need it.

I had made arrangements for 24 hour companions for the first week although because I came home early there were a few cracks in the system in the first couple of days. Those were the 2 days that I probably needed people the most. I too, treasure my alone time and am used to living alone. I made clear to my volunteers that I wouldn't necessarily want to interact with them and they should bring things to keep themselves entertained. I also felt free to send them home before their "shift" was up so that I got some alone time when I felt like I needed it. Everyone was really understanding about this.

So that is my recommendation. Set up the 24 hour companions before hand because then the system is in place. Then adjust accordingly when the time comes. If people know going into it what the possibilities are, thy'll probably be just fine wiuth whatever you decide.

Best of luck and I hope you are blessed with the kind of recovery that I have been.

www.caringbridge.com/mn/jymme

 

[Mara]

Hi Ed.
I am with the others. You need to have someone there for at least the first 2 weeks. My husband was a grad student when I had my surgery so that was okay, he was out for the summer. My mom took a week off under the Family and Medical Leave Act. See if your wife can do that. It works like short term disability so it pays you what ever that rate is (66%?) and is not vacation time. I stayed at my mom's house which was 10 minutes from the hospital where I had my surgery. Plus, my cardiologist is my parent's next door neighbor! That was nice. He would stop by and make sure I was walking. My in-laws were around for a week, too. I had my surgery 5 days after we got married! How's that for planning and an expensive honeymoon! I remember sleeping a lot for the first 4 days home. Everyone was understanding of my need to sleep or be alone. But, you might need someone to go rent movies for you.

Anyway, it was good to have someone around to help you navigate, make you eat and make you walk, to help you shower and change clothes. It's nice. You won't really feel like doing those things and might not be able to with that big incision on your chest. The nurses at the hospital told me not to shower without someone near by, sometimes the hot water can make you faint.

By the end of 10 days I really could do a lot of things for myself but it was nice to have someone around all the time just in case.

Really, have your wife check into taking time under the Family and Medical Leave Act.

-Mara

 

[joy]

There are other questions...Do you have kids? Pets? I have two small kids, and had help at home for the first three weeks, but I had a friend watch my oldest son(3 years old) for the fourth week while my husband was at work. I kept my 3 month old at home with me, but had the option of going over to the friend's house. Maybe your wife could drop you off somewhere? These are all important issues to talk to your wife about now rather than wait.

 

[martha]

Everyone has answered your question. I live alone, and my mother was here while I was in the hospital. She needed to get home afterwards. So after six days in the hospital I went into a rehab center. Deffinatly not a nurseing home. They were wonderful, and helped get me going. After two weeks there, I had a girl friend there with me for 10 days. The first three days home from rehab I slept. After that we were up and doing things, slowly. martha

 

[Jennie]

Hi Ed,

My two cents in here.... I think the idea of "around the clock care" and nurses may be just a tad unnecessary, though I realize some folks may indeed require it. I really think it depends on how things go in the hospital, like did everything go smoothly or were there some complications that occurred. Some folks here couldn't do steps for a couple weeks, while others of us had no troubles there. I see that you're not that old and into sports, so I am assuming that you are in decent shape other than the little valve problem - these factors must be taken into consideration too.

I was set up at some friends' house where everyone was in work or school all day. I would wake up around 8:00, everyone would be gone already, but they had some easy breakfast stuff handy (like cereal, with juice and milk in a smaller containers so I could lift them easily), and same with lunch (I'd have some low-salt crackers and tuna and fruit or cottage cheese or a sandwich), or perhaps someone would be able to pop home during lunch. When I woke up in the morning, I had a leisurely breakfast, a shower, a little nap, a little walk, lunch, some email viewing or leisure time on the deck, then a longer nap, and people were home by the time I woke up. The days went by pretty fast. People dropped in here and there, and were taking me out places every other day or so by the second week. I was armed with everyone's pagers and work numbers. I think if you were staying totally by yourself it would be a different story, but with your wife there in the evenings, helping prepare your meals ahead of time and setting you up with a nice dinner and doing dishes and keeping up with the house stuff, I personally think you could swing it. Didn't need help with showers, could walk around outside by myself, had myself set up with a little chart for my meds. Just needed to take things slow and tell myself NO when I got dumb ideas like helping with the dishes - I had to learn, basically, how to relax on the couch! Be smart - take the cell phone with you when you go for walks, and wear a MedAlert ID, and don't wander off into unpopulated areas by yourself. Cut back on the hot water when taking a shower, as much as it might feel good, so you don't get woozy.

Like I said, my two cents. Ask your cardio and see what he thinks you'll need. What Al said about having your wife take off the first week you're home instead of while you're in the hospital - something to think about. I almost had too many visitors in the hospital - I had a hard time getting my naps in between entertaining them and the nursing staff.

best wishes on all this. keep us posted on your surgery scene.

-Jennie

 

[Igor]

Hi Ed.
I am 2 and a half months post op and as far as I can remember the first week was the uneasy one. The first couple of days was the most difficult time when I even need help to get my clothes on, getting off the shower, and on some other little things. Then after the first week things started to get a bit easy every day, little by little. A week after I even tried to do some cooking, without any success though. My wife was my constant support during the first few weeks on 24 by 7 basis regardless how tired she was and it was very nice of her. I do not think you will need a nurse during even the first week.
I think you should try to do as much as possible by yourself. Of course, making sure that you are not over doing it. It will help you to get back to normal even faster. When you get tired, you will just then rest for an hour or so. I think it will make you feel more comfortable if you can arrange your friends, coworkers or relatives to stop by for an hour on some kind of schedule during the time your wife is not home. However, if psychologically you do not need anybody to be around, I think physically you will be fine by just being alone. Good luck and keep us posted.