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J

Jimeskimo's girl

I noticed that dad hasn't posted since he got home yesterday the 10th at 1:00 pm pac. time. Wanted to let you know that he said he feels awful. worst experience of his life and God knows he's had many. He has no appetite and survives basically on fruit and coffee. He does drink alot of water, however. I was wondering all, does Prozac or something similar usually go along with the daily cockail that the doc prescribed? I sure think it should!!
He stated to me that had he known how bad he would feel and how badly it would hurt, he would not have had the surgery. That makes me feel awful!!!! Now I think he only did it for the kids, myself and my brother. I would like to think at some point he would be glad for himself that he did this. Christmas and all the Holidays are just around the corner, sorry for the reminder everyone, but I was wondering, is he going to feel well enough to enjoy them???!!!!
Thanks all for your support the last few weeks. I'm sure as soon as dad is feeling good enough to climb back behind his computer, he will.
Love Ya'
Laura
 
You are going get lots of replies to this one! Rather common for depression in heart patients and yes, the dr should take care of it. Hope he has a good cardio in Alaska where he lives. I truly hope/pray that once he is on his feet again, he will know how much better he is over how bad he WAS. And that he will once again enjoy his family. I have found that each new day is a gift and it's been 2 1/2 yrs for me, however, my surgery was different and recovery was easy. Sounds like he has been through the mill.

Jim, if you are around, please stop by to see us and maybe there will be just one post that will help. God bless Ann (Hensylee)
 
Questions?

Questions?

Laura, We never did find out where your Dad was going after hospital. I thought home with you..I hope whereever he is..he has help around the clock for first 2 weeks. Bathroom, water for meds, ect. Yes, he will hurt if he doesn.t take his pain meds..He is going to be foggy headed..not wanting to talk on phone, ect...but after about 2-3 weeks will start to feel like walking, eating, ect..Let us know how he is..Bonnie
 
Open heart surgery is a tremendous thing, a great change in life; what does it all mean? How is my life different now than before? I'm still wondering.
Listen to what your father says, but take it all with a grain of salt. Try to listen to the thoughts behind the words. I found it very difficult to express myself after surgery -- not only finding words it was a little difficult to remember, but also trying to speak to people who didn't understand what I'd just been through.
Patience is always a virtue.
 
HI Laura and Jim-

The surgery is not like an appendectomy, it's tough and there are some adjustments after surgery. The very most important thing to remember is that you will feel better and better after the initial few weeks. The pain will go away and all the little adjustments will finally get ironed out. This surgery was done to save your life and also to give you a better quality of life. It's a sure thing that if you didn't go through this experience, you would have ended up in very bad physical condition, if not immediately, sooner or later. And then your life span would have been cut short.

Depression is such a common thing after heart surgery. Everyone has it to some degree or other. Meds can help tremendously. Please discuss this with the doctor. You will be amazed at how much they help.

I have watched my husband go through three valve surgeries, plus 2 lung surgeries which he said were even worse than heart surgery and several other very serious things. They're all behind him now, but it wasn't easy to go through the recoveries. It takes time and a lot of patience for the patient and the family as well. The recovery will be slow, but it will be steady.

Jim, please know that you have lots and lots of friends here. We all understand what you are going through. You will get better and you will enjoy life again. Your appetite will come back as soon as some more healing takes place. Your body is really a miracle machine. It can heal from very profound things. One day at a time and go easy on yourself. Rome wasn't built in a day.

Come on here and post to us and vent a little. Take care.
 
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Laura,

I'm a little surprised by your dad's comments about pain. Is it chest pain or muscular or lung / chest wall? Pain SHOULD be controlled by medication. It is important NOT to wait too long before taking the pain pills, i.e. until after they wear off because it takes time for the next pill to become effective.

Massage therapy helps greatly with muscle pain.

Does your father have someone to help him at home?

Hope he improves soon.

'AL'
 
JimL wrapped it up in a nutshell.

I had a terrible time, as you may well know by now. If I try to sleep on my left side, I'm in pain. Pain meds don't help me. It's been almost 3 months for me, since surgery. My sternum isn't what is bothering me. It's my ribs and left lung. They cut 2 blebs off my left lung and I think it's scar tissue pulling, but I don't really know.

The depression thing is so common that we could probably start another web site exclusively for that topic. My concern here is, if they give him some type of antidepressant, try to be sure that it's something that he cannot get addicted to, if they plan on long term therapy. They gave me Paxil and after reading about the addictive qualities of it, I put it away and refuse to take it. I get my stress and depression relief talking to other heart and lung patients. It keeps my mind off of my own thoughts and reminds me that I'm not alone in my feelings. It's just plain great therapy.
If you can get him back on the computer, I'd be happy to share in his feelings, thoughts, and emotions. I've been through this heart and lung stuff twice now, so I think I'm semi qualified to help him out. I think everyone here is just as qualified! We've all been there and done that and know what we feel and think.
I'll get off my soapbox now.

By all means, listen to what dad says, and I'm not sure that you should take it with a grain of salt. That can be very upsetting to him. I know it was for me!

Please keep us informed as you can.

Ross
 
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Stalker

Stalker

I stalk the guy up above me..:D :D I keep making him change things on my avator?..picture..words of wisdom..ect. He stays busy..:p :p :p Don't give him a chance to get depressed.:D :D :D Saw your Dad on valvereplacement.com this morning..I suppose just reading. Probably don't feel like typing. I couldn't even talk good.:D :D Bonnie
 
When I came home 3 weeks ago, my hands were shaking so badly that I couldn't type. That's what Ativan can do to you!
 
Hi Laura!

Hi Laura!

I just had my AVR almost three weeks ago. I was on Prozac before the surgery and am continuing to take it now after the surgery. I think it has helped some. You have to be careful because Prozac at least (not sure about other meds) increases what Coumadin is to accomplish with the blood (not sure if this applies to your dad). So docs have to take that into consideration when trying to get your coumadin levels stable. Regarding the surgery itself. It was the worst thing I ever had to go through. I'm glad it is now over with. The first week or two was the worst. I hated the pain meds because they just made me feel loopy and I didn't take them as often as I should have. I'm slowly feeling better every day, and as time goes by I tend to forget (but not completely...lol) how bad it was right after surgery. I have had two c-sections in the past that I bounced back quickly from. I thought I was going to bounce back just as quickly from the heart surgery, but needless to say I have not. It definately takes time. There are good days and bad days. I hope, as your dad starts to feel a little better his depression will start to improve. If not, be sure to mention it to his doctors. I am new to this site and I am so glad I have these wonderful people for support. They really make a difference.

Take Care and Good Luck!
Creed3
 
Creed3

Creed3

Thought you were a guy until I read you mentioned having 2 c-sections:D :D Got a first name?:) bonnie
 
Laura,

In response to your question about Thanksgiving and Christmas, I think it's safe to assume that Dad will be feeling considerably better by Thanksgiving and a whole lot better by Christmas.

Please fill us in on what his current living conditions are. Who's helping to care for him? Who's nagging him to take his walks and use the spirometer? Is he getting enough personal attention? I'm sure he needs someone who will listen to him when he feels like complaining or just talking.

Maybe you can contact the surgeon's office or the cardiologist to discuss some of your concerns regarding medications and apparent depression. They may be able to offer some very tangible solutions or at least reassure you that what he is going through is not a long lasting or serious problem and that time to heal futher will help him considerably.

Psychologically, this was a major trauma for him and it takes a long while to adjust to it. It's a lot harder to try to sort out all the thoughts running through your mind when you're on pain medications and on some tof the other drugs prescribed.

Jim, if you're out there reading this, why don't you get on line and vent here. We'd be thrilled to hear from you. Hang in there, buddy, it gets a lot better!

Ron K
 
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