Surgery 3/9 starting to freak

[susieq14]

Linda,
Just wanted to chime in and let you know that your feelings of anxiety do not seem so off-base. I have not had OHS yet but I would imagine that it seems a little more daunting because of the fact that they are operating on your heart. And for part of the surgery, they stop your heart and let a machine do its job. Quite a bit scary to me! Wish I could stop thinking about it and I don't even have a surgery date! I keep wishing I could volunteer to do it right now because I worry about having surgery when I'm older. I was diagnosed at age 53 and am now 56 andI keep wishing I could volunteer to do it right now because I worry about having surgery when I'm older.

Can't offer much more advice how to get through these next 3 weeks. I would ditto the suggestion that you ask to be excused from that big project at work. It would be nice if you could spend more time with your daughter and husband.

You have my very best wishes and lots of positive thoughts!

Peace!
Susie

 

[Susan BAV]

Hi again Linda -

Those ideas about you requesting your docs put you on disability prior to your surgery sound pretty good to me; it might take a huge emotional and physical load off you.

I'll have to say that I am one to take as few meds as is humanly possible -- that is my disclaimer -- but I also don't think I would want to have anymore chemicals/meds in my body, however, than is necessary when preparing for and leading up to surgery, including those meds suggested here to calm you, unless you are already on a doctor prescribed rx that has been okayed by your surgeon. That's just my opinion.

Whatever you decide on that, maybe you would want to clear any meds with your surgeon first though. That would also include any homeopathic and/or herbal supplements.

 

[rachette5]

Hi Linda,
We must be on the same boat. I have been told about my regurgitation a few months ago but I kept putting it on the back burner. However, I am looking at having it done in early march after I see my cardio.
I lived in Jersey years ago. Where from?


Rachelle

 

[TomS]

Here's what helped me. I asked the surgeon what the odds were that I wouldn't get off the operating table alive. He told me that he guarenteed 100% that he would get me off the table alive. He said that he couldn't guarentee that everything would work out overall, but that he would absolutely get me off the table. That made me feel that I had some control. That he was going to do his job, and the rest was up to me. I knew that I was going to wake up.
Also, I asked someone that had a valve replaced several years before if he thought that he might die before the operation. He told me that if I felt that way, then I shouldn't have the operation, that it made no sense since the point of having it is exactly the opposite. That made me really think about why I was having it done.
With a mortality rate for good Doc's below 1%, it's no different than any other operation, except that the consequences of not having it are completely unacceptable.
Talk to your surgeon again. You need to get your confidence up.

 

[LindaVA]

Haven't had contact with surgeon

Haven't had contact with surgeon

Tom- your post does make me feel better-- I just wish I had contact with the surgeon and his team-- I only met him once and won't see him again until I'm admitted-- is that standard with large hospitals? I did have to go for a preop to a cardiologist who is following me, not the surgeon. Again, I've only had 1 apptmtn with the surgeon.

Its not necessarily him I worry about b/c he is skilled and well regarded-- Its that I don't know who the anesthesia, perfusionists are-- I don't know any of the team-- in terms of waking up I'm more worried about them then the heart surgeon...

 

[MikeHeim]

I just wish I had contact with the surgeon and his team-- I only met him once and won't see him again until I'm admitted-- is that standard with large hospitals?

From both my experience and what I've read on this site, I think it is pretty standard. I met with my surgeon for about an hour just prior to my scheduling, and I didn't see him again until I was in the ICU. That was actually the last time I saw him as well.

 

[Mary]

Tom- your post does make me feel better-- I just wish I had contact with the surgeon and his team-- I only met him once and won't see him again until I'm admitted-- is that standard with large hospitals? I did have to go for a preop to a cardiologist who is following me, not the surgeon. Again, I've only had 1 apptmtn with the surgeon.

Its not necessarily him I worry about b/c he is skilled and well regarded-- Its that I don't know who the anesthesia, perfusionists are-- I don't know any of the team-- in terms of waking up I'm more worried about them then the heart surgeon...

You'll visit with the anesthesiologist before surgery. You will have time to talk to him about the vent and any past surgical experiences you've had. I doubt that you'll meet the perfusionist; there's really no reason too.
I agree with the others that you can always call the cardiologist and ask for some medication to help you through this rough patch preceding surgery. Gee, I was so scared I still don't know how I managed to walk into the hospital. However it wasn't nearly as bad as what I feared.

 

[GeorgeM]

Linda

My experience about having contact withy my surgeon is similar to yours. But I knew he was a highly experienced surgeon supported by the team around him. So eventually I had to allow myself to pass control of 'me' for the period of my operation to them. Not easy to accept I know.

But consider this. You have a medical problem and they're gonna solve it for you - and when you wake up the problem will be solved. If you reject their offer of help - then responsibility falls to you, you have to sort out your own problem.

Faced with that choice the decision to go ahead was actually an easy one to make.

I hope you can work it out for yourself with the help and support of your family.

Best Wishes

George Montgomery

 

[TomS]

Yes, it's fairly normal for you to meet with the surgeon only once, and to not see much of him/her after the operation. I went back to mine a second time beforehand to answer some questions that I had. You may want to as well. I was also at a big hospital - Cornell in NYC, but actually saw the surgeon every day that I was there.
The other clinical people would be part of the process if you were having your gall bladder removed. Trust the system as long as you are going to a very good hospital.
Also, it feels literally like a split-second goes by between when they put you out and you wake up, so you're not going to have much time to worry.

 

[EVELYN]

Hi Linda

Please don't think your feelings are any different from anyone on this list. Everyone goes through the same ups and downs that you are dealing with, but we DO get through them. It's so normal to be anxious and say you want to cancel, but you know that's not really what you want to do.

You WANT to be healthy and enjoy your family, you WANT a life with no limitations, you WANT to just get this over with and begin your new life. Yes, you're scared of dying and leaving your child, yes you're anxious, yes you're an emotional wreck right now, but you're a smart woman who knows what will happen if you DON"T have the surgery. Emergency surgery is nothing to sneeze (no pun intended) at and while the chances of you coming through this surgery is fantastic, the odds drop drastically with an emergency situation, as does the health and elasticity of your heart.

Do it for your child....Moms are sorely needed for the long term in our world today.

I know you will make the right decision for the right reasons. Good luck.

Evelyn

 

[WayneGM]

I only met with the surgeon, Dr. David, once pre-op, and none of the OR staff until I was introduced to 'the Team" as they preped me just minutes before putting me under. At pre-admission, I met a few of Dr. David's associates from the recovery area, but not the OR team.

If it's any comfort, I was so pleasantly surprised by how smooth and efficient everybody was...the OR Team, ICU staff, recovery unit staff...everyone. It was like watching a symphony orchestra with everyone doing their individual parts flawlessly. They were very warm and friendly, and tried to explain everything they were doing as they were doing it so I wouldn't be apprehensive or surprised. I had never been admitted to hospital before, let alone surgery, and really did not expect this. I can honestly say I even look back at my hospital stay fondly...not that I'd necessarily want to do it again.

 

[Garth51]

Linda
Everything is going to be alright and you,re going to feel so much better after your heart is repaired!I felt a lot like you a little over a year ago and I only met with my surgeon once before I was admitted to the hospital for surgery.I was worried about a lot of "what ifs" just like you are,which is to be expected.I had a will but I wrote a short living will and showed my wife and parents and then I put it in the filing cabinet.I also wrote a short letter to my children and family and put it in the filing cabinet "just in case".I got a huge amount of support from a lot of the same folks who are replying to your posts,we are all here for you and we've been to the other side,some folks have made the trip several times!It's a hard thing to wrap your mind around (OHS) and I think it's very helpful to place this worrisome burden in a higher power of your own.I have always believed in God but I hadn't attended church for sometime ,I started to read a few pages from my Bible each night just before going to sleep.Then one night a friend called and asked if I would like to attend a Bible study that was held at my local hospital chapel once a week at noon,that he had been attending.After a few weeks of these short Bible studies with my friend,the Pastor and a few other people,my relationship and faith with the Lord became much stronger!I was previously scared just like everyone else and I was telling folks on this site my fears.After these few weeks of Bible study and reaching out for help from my higher power I was Blessed and I was no longer afraid of my upcoming surgery and I was then able to post on this site that I was ready for anything that was to come during my surgery!I placed my heavy burden in the strong hands of my higher power and I believed that if he had led me to the surgery,he would also be with me through the surgery and recovery and I believe he is still with me.I still have problems and worries at times but I keep trusting and relying on my higher power to bring me through it.I also get a lot of good support and info from this wonderful site.
I think you will meet with your surgeon and some of the team once you're admitted to hospital before your surgery.These are highly trained people and they do this work routinely.You will be well taken care of and the pain meds work great.A few days after my surgery,my surgeon and his assistant came to my room and told me that my heart was fixed and that my diseased valve was much worse than they had anticipated and that it probably would have been fatal in less than 1 year had they not operated.The sense of relief I felt after being told that my heart was fixed was fantastic,I think my wife gave him a big hug.
All of the "what ifs" I had worried about never happened but the outcome could have been much different had I let my fears win.Everything is going to be ok,you just have to believe!Best Wishes and God Bless You.