Recovering alone

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WayneGM

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 3, 2006
Messages
4,624
Location
Waterdown, Ontario Canada
Welcome to the VR Community, Paul. Glad you found us.

My wife stayed home with me for a few days after my discharge from the hospital, but I was pretty much home alone during my recovery. We just made to be organized. For example, make sure things I needed were within reach and planning meals I could easily prepare. It really wasn't too bad. However, until I could drive I had to get a lift to doctors appointments and so forth.

Best wishes and good luck.
 

Bina

Premium Level User
Joined
Feb 22, 2007
Messages
12,692
Location
East Ontario, Canada
Rachel are you rolling your eyes at me??;) ;) :)
Those of us who go into surgery in very bad heart condition have more problems during recovery.

Strong, and otherwise healthy men just breeze through it.
 

pedimed

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 18, 2006
Messages
66
Location
Boston, MA
Hi,
I too recovered on my own. I echo Rachel's suggestions.
I would avoid driving-especially if you have a standard; for at least a few weeks.

I actually flew to 2 interviews withiin teh 8weeks I was recovering; not something I would suggest doing but they went well! Smile..

People will want to help, and although it may be difficult to accept, take them up on the offer!

good luck!

Best wishes
 
S

Susan BAV

Guest
Welcome to the site, Paul; glad you found it!

Those of you who didn't need help are tough and amazing. Bravo!

We live in the boonies--literally miles from any stores--and also quite some long distance from the hospital (three hours in mostly horrendous traffic) and with not driving for eight weeks as per my surgeon and being rehospitalized for one fairly common post-op issue, I needed some help for a couple of weeks--not to mention the wildfire chaos and evacuation that roared through here two weeks post-op. I also found that having someone at least nearby was a big morale booster because a person can have some low morale issues early on also. (That said, I had to stick a note on my door to cut down on all the visitors.)

Hope all goes well for you Paul. Take care and post again.
 

VikiVix

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 2, 2007
Messages
121
Location
Ben Lomond, CA
Recovered alone

Recovered alone

Hi Paul
I had my son staying with me the first month but after that I too was on my own. It was scarey but I was very careful about everything including showering, standing doing dishes, etc. etc.
The fears passed slowly, the loneliness wasn't fun but I managed as time passed.
I'm a single gramma and was living alone with my cat at the time in a small studio apartment. I now rent a room in a house with a couple in their 50's so I feel more secure.
Feel free to keep in touch with anything concerning this, and know that this website really helps a lot.
Viki
 

Bina

Premium Level User
Joined
Feb 22, 2007
Messages
12,692
Location
East Ontario, Canada
Rachel, no offense taken.:) I agree that alot of "stuff" is not really necessary, we all make do with what we have. I personally found recliners to be very difficult. Maybe I'm just too small for them... I preferred to either lay down or sit up straight, nothing in between worked. We survive!!
 
G

Guest

Guest
rachel_howell said:
What I mentally roll my eyes at is the whole notion that you HAVE to have certain things in order to recover
AMEN!

Rachel ... glad someone else feels similar to how I do about this.

*sighs*

I believe I mentioned it to Ann, during our visit while I was on my road trip a few weeks ago now, that I get so frustrated with people posting how important it is to have a significant other (wife/gf/husband/bf, whatever) to help you through the entire process/difficult times. Well, some of us aren't so lucky....

*grumbles*

And, yes, I know ... I sound disastrously bitter, but I promise you, I'm not. I'm just tired of society, in general, treating singles like dirt.

*rolls eyes*

Course, to that end, I've been told I just need sex. And, oh how I love it when someone says that to me ... and then doesn't have any idea of a female who might be able AND willing to help me out on that stage...he heh.

Irony rocks.



Cort:34swm."Mr Monte Carlo.Mr Road Trip".pig valve.pacemaker
WRMNshowcase.lego.HO.model.MCs.RT.CHD = http://www.chevyasylum.com/cort
"Your friends have shown a kink in the single life" ... The Raconteurs ... 'Steady As She Goes'
 

perkicar

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 1, 2004
Messages
628
Location
Columbus, OH
I stayed with my brother and wife after I got sprung 8 days post op. I ended up back in the hospital a week later with a pericardial effusion, but considering I felt pretty crappy I can actually say I didn't mind going back. After I came back to Louisville, I had 2 friends and a niece stay with me over the next three weeks, mostly until I was allowed to drive again. It was nice having the company but quite honestly, I did much better after I was back on my own and had to be self sufficient. It's nice to have someone wait on you, but I was alot more active after I had to be!
I have a mechanical valve and while I hear it clicking, it has never bothered me. The funniest thing happened when I was getting a massage a year or so ago--it was with a student and there was a lull in the music. She was working up by my head, so could hear the ticking when it was quiet. She asked what the sound was and when I told her it was my heart, she got a little flustered!
Good luck to you and let us know how things work out.

Carolyn
 

carolinemc

Well-known member
Joined
May 31, 2010
Messages
632
Location
kansas city, mo
I am single my whole life, 56 hate it
I am 54 and had double bypass at 38, recovered on my own and was happy I was alone. I get grouchy when people are around. I have always been this way for many years. When you have your bad days, you do not want anyone around. Newwarrior, you can do this by yourself. go on walks, get out and about. You do not have to stay indoors during recovery. What did you do before surgery? Try to slowly go back to that activity or more. You will be fine. I did it, a lot of us did it, and so can you. And I love being single female. No one to tell me what to do, no kids to worry about, and no husband to hover over me. Single life is not bad. You just need to get out and meet people. You can have a female friend. You can have girlfriends. You do not have to be married. Get out. Have fun.
 

newarrior

Have mild AS live in Thailand
Joined
Jun 29, 2019
Messages
15
Location
Bangkok, Thailand
I am 54 and had double bypass at 38, recovered on my own and was happy I was alone. I get grouchy when people are around. I have always been this way for many years. When you have your bad days, you do not want anyone around. Newwarrior, you can do this by yourself. go on walks, get out and about. You do not have to stay indoors during recovery. What did you do before surgery? Try to slowly go back to that activity or more. You will be fine. I did it, a lot of us did it, and so can you. And I love being single female. No one to tell me what to do, no kids to worry about, and no husband to hover over me. Single life is not bad. You just need to get out and meet people. You can have a female friend. You can have girlfriends. You do not have to be married. Get out. Have fun.
I never had surgery ...surgery it's probably years away I just meant I've been a lonely and lonely and single most of my life and I hate it... I don't know how to get a girlfriend I barely even know how to get on a date on 56 never married no kids only had two girlfriends my entire life I don't understand anything about women at all it's too painful to try to chase them I had no luck with women my entire life the rejection Hurts The Suffering hurts it hurts so much but being alone hurts too but I don't have a faintest idea how to meet girls or how to get a girlfriend in Clueless I'm just so lonely
 

carolinemc

Well-known member
Joined
May 31, 2010
Messages
632
Location
kansas city, mo
I never had surgery ...surgery it's probably years away I just meant I've been a lonely and lonely and single most of my life and I hate it... I don't know how to get a girlfriend I barely even know how to get on a date on 56 never married no kids only had two girlfriends my entire life I don't understand anything about women at all it's too painful to try to chase them I had no luck with women my entire life the rejection Hurts The Suffering hurts it hurts so much but being alone hurts too but I don't have a faintest idea how to meet girls or how to get a girlfriend in Clueless I'm just so lonely
Don't hate being alone all the time, try for a small part of the time. I have a pet, a dog, from a rescue, named Dixie. We rescued each other. I feel you might get a pet, emotional support(does not have to be trained). Mine is very supportive all the time. She has cataracts and I cannot afford the surgery for her. But she will eventually go blind and she lean on me and will adapt as many dogs have.
I never let not having a man, get me down. I don't hate men, just haven't met the right one. I have abused by a close relation years as a young girl, left its mark, but I moved on. Do not worry about having a woman, for there is one that you will someday meet, just not yet.
Do not hate life due to that being alone. It does have advantages, like not a nagging wife bugging you everyday to do something around the house. Or wants to snuggle all the time. Or wants to be nosy. And no kids. LOL!
I just grin and bare it everyday in my loneliness. You can't miss what you do not have. True words of wisdom. Not everyone is meant to marry, you can have a female friend. Nothing wrong with that. I have a few male friends, nothing intimate, just friends. Just stop pressuring yourself in wife hunting. You have nothing to prove to anyone. Just relax and enjoy life. I am. Hugs for today. 😎
 

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