How long until I can be left alone?

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MrsBray

VR.org Supporter
Supporting Member
Joined
Nov 1, 2013
Messages
288
Location
Clearwater/Tampa FL area
I know, I know, "Ask your doctor!" Except that it's Friday night, and my siblings are asking about the "Babysitter Schedule" and I'm trying to arrange coverage for my part time job. My husband can do my job for me, or he can babysit me, but he can't do both. The job requires about 90 minutes a day away from home, from 6-8am.

ThankYouVeryMuch InAdvance!
 
MrsBray said:
I know, I know, "Ask your doctor!" Except that it's Friday night, and my siblings are asking about the "Babysitter Schedule" and I'm trying to arrange coverage for my part time job. My husband can do my job for me, or he can babysit me, but he can't do both. The job requires about 90 minutes a day away from home, from 6-8am.

ThankYouVeryMuch InAdvance!
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Alone for a few hours shouldnt be a problem, even from the beginning. You'll be able to do than you expect as long as you dont life heavy thing (gallon of milk up) But 6-8 or 9am by yourself, shouldnt be a problem. heck he could be home before you wake up.
The first days home I liked Justin to take his shower when someone was home but for the most part he was ok. I dont know if your husband likes to cook, but If your siblings want to help having meals cooked is always a big help. Even if they make things you can freeze type of thing. I dont know if you have pets but if so someone to walk the dog can be good.
 
Being alone should not be a problem at all. Two weeks after discharge I actually flew home alone. I had surgery out of state. The first week after surgery my sister stayed with me at the hotel. The next week I stayed with a couple I new. I stayed at there house alone while they were at work. I then flew home alone. My father took me to the grocery store the day after I got back to my house. They stayed a couple of days and then I was completely on my own. I had 3 weeks at home without being allowed to drive. Church members drove me to church and doctor's appointments and my step-son came to visit me with his family and took me out to eat. I was able to take my own shower and dress myself before discharge.

Debbie
 
I think it all depends on how your recovery is going. I was able to be left alone for an hour or so during the day after the second week or so, but not longer as I would have had problems getting things for myself…hubby once went out and I wanted a cuppa but lifitng the kettle and filling it porved rather more painful on my sternum that I would ever have guessed ! I have felt much tireder and weaker than I would have guessed too. Hubby's been having to take me to doctors' appointments by car (just coming up to week six post op) - I can't get places by myself yet - the weather doesn't help of course so that's partly the problem - in an ideal world OHS should be in spring or autumn !
 
Yay! So my babysitters are mostly going to be doing housework - vacuumimg, kitty litter duty - and driving. That will be a HUGE relief to my sister. She was terrified at the thought of taking care of a heart patient the first week at home! I hope I'm not too awfully whiny. By the time my mom gets here 1 week post-op, I should be reasonable enough to handle her, and by the time my brother gets here 2 weeks later, we'll be able to play video games! :)
 
MrsBray said:
Yay! So my babysitters are mostly going to be doing housework - vacuumimg, kitty litter duty - and driving. That will be a HUGE relief to my sister. She was terrified at the thought of taking care of a heart patient the first week at home! I hope I'm not too awfully whiny. By the time my mom gets here 1 week post-op, I should be reasonable enough to handle her, and by the time my brother gets here 2 weeks later, we'll be able to play video games! :)
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Unless you have some complication, then yes.That sounds about right. How ever even when Justin did have bad complications, once he got home, he was getting bored pretty quick (I think is a good sign when you are bored), If there ever was a hobby you wanted to learn to do but never had time, learn it now. One year we did ceramics, another we learned (from you tube and online) how to make macreme bracelets. etc. Actually one of our "getting ready for the hospital shopping trips" was always AC Moor crafts to find something new to learn :) (and make lots of good Xmas gifts to give everyone :)

IF they have to go out for a short time, it helps to make sure anything you will need is on the counter, so you dont have to reach high or bend low to get things out of cabinets, like glasses or dishes etc
I'm sure it was pushing it a little, (but they were the only game we had tix for, and they were great seats), but Justin and I went to an Eagles game his 2nd week home when he had his surgery a 10. There shouldnt be any bandages to change or anything like that But the most "heart patient" thing they will probably do is go for your walks with you a couple times a day. or Remind you to take any meds that kind of thing..
 
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Because Massachusetts General Hospital, where I had both my OHS, requires someone be home with a newly discharged patient we tried to comply. Even the hospital told me, it was fine for me to be alone for a few hours if I felt up to it. We arranged for someone to be with me when DH had to go to his office and day one it was fine. I found I was happy she was here when I showered the first few times and I felt safer walking stairs though that was in my head, not my body.

By day two home, after my second surgery, I found I made her sandwich for lunch and really didn't need her here for anything. I used common sense and did not do anything stupid but was able to manage on my own just fine during the day until DH got home each late afternoon. I kept my phone in my pocket at all times, I showered and dressed before DH left for the day and then was fine to fix a light lunch and even make light preparations for our dinner.

Each of us heals at our own pace, we are more or less debiliitated predicated on so many variables it is impossible to predict in advance but you likely will not need babysitters nearly as much as you may expect. Arrange for help the first several days or even week and then re-evaluate.

I found the aide to be more annoying than helpful as I was doing well.
 
It really depends on if you have any complications, so you probably wont know until the time unfortunately. I'm second day home after discharge and insisted that my family head out to the park this afternoon because its such a beautiful day. They have been gone 5 hours so far and I am absolutely fine in being fully able to look at myself...just can't lift to much.
 
Cromey said:
It really depends on if you have any complications, so you probably wont know until the time unfortunately. I'm second day home after discharge and insisted that my family head out to the park this afternoon because its such a beautiful day. They have been gone 5 hours so far and I am absolutely fine in being fully able to look at myself...just can't lift to much.
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Cromey i'm glad to hear you are doing so well after your 4th OHS. I'm curious were you born with one of the more complex Congenital heart defects since i believe this is your first aortic valve replacement?
 
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Hi Lyn,

Fortunately I wasn't born with a complex congenital heart defect. I like to think that I was born with 3 minor issues but all were serious enough to require surgery.
I have (or had I should say) mitral valve stenosis, a Bicuspid aortic valve and a Coarctation of the aorta (which required repairing and re-repairing).

Like many people on here I will forever be grateful to modern medical science and I think it has given me a very positive outlook on life.
Dave
 
I was left alone from the second day I returned home. My daughter went to school and my wife to work. I was alone from 7-3:30 every day. You don't really need any assistance. For food, you can reheat leftovers, use a microwave meal or fix a sandwich. I was doing light cooking by the end of the first week. You just can't lift anything heavier than a gallon of milk. You won't be able to drive until you cut down on the prescription pain killers, for me about 3 weeks at home.
 
I live alone and was by myself as soon as I was out of hospital. Someone stopped by every day, generally to take me out for coffee, beach for a walk, etc. definitely not to 'take care of me'. If I'd had a babysitter I would have felt thoroughly demoralised!!!
 
i had my wife still feeding me grapes after 2 weeks, and peeling them as well lol, on a serious note some good advice already given, remember every body heals at a different rate,
 
ski girl said:
I live alone and was by myself as soon as I was out of hospital. Someone stopped by every day, generally to take me out for coffee, beach for a walk, etc. definitely not to 'take care of me'. If I'd had a babysitter I would have felt thoroughly demoralised!!!
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Gosh that's so encouraging to know Ski Girl. I'm in the same boat and although I have 2 people who have volunteered to stay with me, I'm reluctant to take them up on it, because quite frankly, I think they'd drive me batty fussing over me!
 
neil said:
i had my wife still feeding me grapes after 2 weeks, and peeling them as well lol, on a serious note some good advice already given, remember every body heals at a different rate,
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I suppose you had egg in your beer, as well?

I had my heart cath yesterday, and it was a COMPLETELY different experience than a year ago. All I remember is the nurse telling me,"I'm going to give you a margarita now...." I'm getting really antsy about getting this done and over with. I've got a recliner, I've got a shower bench, I've got a full freezer. Come ON, already! :)
 
Anya said:
Gosh that's so encouraging to know Ski Girl. I'm in the same boat and although I have 2 people who have volunteered to stay with me, I'm reluctant to take them up on it, because quite frankly, I think they'd drive me batty fussing over me!
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Anya I fully agree! I also think I was better able to get the rest I needed being by myself, as having people around would have made me feel I needed to at least *speak* to them which would have been energy NOT spent healing.

Before I went into hospital I made sure to bring plates, etc down from the high cupboards and onto the counter tops so I didn't have to do any reaching over my head. The only thing that stumped me was how to get laundry out of the washing machine . . . I couldn't reach down that far . . . as I stood there staring at my undies that seemed to be miles away, I remembered I had a pair of bbq tongs. Worked a treat. :) You'll sort it all out, and IMHO feel better for being independent and therefore NOT SICK which for me at least, would have been the most awful thing. Good luck!
 
epstns said:
Now the prankster comes out. . .

MrsBray asked "How long until I can be left alone?"

Answer: It depends. Are you a good girl?

Steve runs and hides. . .
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Ha! I've got three weeks of sitters lined up, about half for me and half for my husband's benefit. The last thing I want to do is burn him out. It'll be nice to have time with my sister and brother without parents and children hovering. I'm going to learn backgammon and Wii Mario!
 
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