Pre-surgery--a wife's questions

[EVELYN]

Hello....I'm Evelyn and finally figured out how to post my message. Thank you Hank for filling me in on the "How to's" I'm writing because my husband will undergo aortic valve replacement surgery next Wednesday at St. Francis Hospital in Long Island. I would first like to say that this list has been absolutely wonderful. I've read all your posts regarding presurgery, post surgery, and what to expect, but needless to say, it is overwhelming. He's pretty good about it and is mentally ready for the procedure....I'm not quite in that boat! He's 59, in good health, a nonsmoker, no diabetes and not overweight. His surgeon assures us that he is in a great position to have an extremely successful surgery. Of course, there are the what if's.....and that is what I would like to address to this group. Does anyone know the percentages of stroke? heart attack? heart failure? I'm not the least bit worried about coming home, that I feel we can cope with. Any help you all could give us would be wonderful. Thank you. Evelyn

[Ross]

Welcome Evelyn

Do your self a huge favor-Don't occupy your mind with "what ifs".
It will drive you insane and cause a lot of unneeded worry.
I don't have percentages available. I can try and get you some, if no one else posts any, but really, the risks aren't as bad as you may think. 10 years ago, you had a pretty good reason to worry.
Now, these things have become real common place and all possible routes to avoid complications, are taken.

The problem group appears to be those advanced in age (80+) and those who have had multiple surgeries in the past. Even those people seem to be doing much better now a days.

Welcome to the forums and try to relax yourself. Your husband is going to need you and you need to be relaxed and ready for the project at hand. I'll check around for some percentages, but please remember, they don't often reflect the truth behind the numbers. Each individual case is unique and different. ;)

I've checked multiple sites and haven't found any percentages so to speak. You may want to check with the surgeon doing the surgery, to see what he has to say. Don't be surprised if he doesn't express things in percentages.

[Sunshine susan]

Evelyn, do try not to worry too much. It sounds as if your husband is as good a candidate for this surgery as one can be. I had my aortic valve replaced 3 years ago with the St. Judes. By the end of one week, I was walking 1-1/2 miles and 4 miles a day by the time I went back to work 6 weeks later--full time. Just a few things to think about though--he needs to do all the breathing exercises he can--they will give him an incentive sppirometer and he should be blowing as much as possible and the next thing is to walk, walk, walk. When he comes home, he will be sore and tired, but otherwise not likely feeling too bad. A stool for the shower is a good idea, but he won't be an "invalid". He needs to have rest times, but be up and about as much as he feels like. He may experience some depression, so go with the flow on that one and just be supportive. Some do more than others--can't say it bothered me much. If he gets the mechanical valve, he may have some adjusting if he hears a slight click. Pretty soon he won't even notice it. His chest will be sore for a few weeks at least, not debilitating, but sore nonetheless. If he keeps a small pillow to clutch to his chest in the event of the dreadful sneeze or cough, he will not feel it too badly. Sneezes are the worst!! I take coumadin, but it has not been a problem keeping fairly regular. These are just a few 1000 ft. high points that I thought I would share. Of course, all surgeries aren't the same, but he will do just fine! Let me know if you have any more specific questions--there are plenty of people here ready to answer with all kinds of experiences. Best of luck! Susan :)

[Nancy]

Hi Evelyn and welcome to this wonderful site. Like you, I am the spouse of a heart valve patient. By the way, is your husband's surgery this Wednesday the 20th, or the following Wednesday, the 27th?

My husband is 71 years old and has had an aortic and mitral valve replacement, both mechanical, a repair on the mitral valve, 2 lung surgeries and many other less complicated surgeries. He's also been through some very nasty and difficult medical things, not even related to heart surgery, the latest one being a problematic gallbladder surgery in May of this year.

I can relate to how you're feeling right now. You can feel very much alone. The only way to approach it is to realize that your husband needs you desperately right now. He needs your strength, he needs your calmness, he needs your belief in him. This is going to be the biggest day in his life, almost like being born again in a way. He'll be helpless, maybe for the first time in his life and will be feeling many different emotions which he has to deal with. He'll need you to get him through. You will become his cheer leader.

The mortality rates for this surgery, in a good hospital and in the hands of a good surgeon are around 2 percent or minus . That means at least 98 percent to the good. So the odds are overwhelmingly in his favor. Lumped in that percentage, are some very, very sick people, and some who are older than your husband, and many who aren't in as general good health as he is. The fact that he never smoked is a very favorable thing. He's young and strong. He just has a bad body part. So "out with the bad thing", and in with a new shiny part. Then with a little healing time, he'll be better than he has been for probably many years.

The surgeons who do this are a dedicated group of doctors. They have superior training, are thorough and very exacting. They do it every day in some form or another and know their way around your heart like the back of their hand. They will pull together an excellent team for the operating room and your husband will have the very best of care in the OR, on the heart surgery floor, and in the ICU just after surgery. You'll be amazed in the science of it all. They'll be tons of equipment, ringing, buzzing and whirring around your husband, all to keep him safe while he recovers those first few days. You'll be very surprised when they get him up for the first time. You'll think it's too soon, but the human body is very strong, and resilient. When he first comes home with you, he'll be very weak, but gradually he'll start to gain strength and will be able to do more and more.

So you'll both be fine through all of this. It's a tough time, but the result will be very good. It's OK to be scared right now, but don't let your fear transfer over to your husband. Put on your best smile, your nicest looking clothes, your cheeriest attitude, especially when he's in the hospital. Look for the humorous things that happen in the hospital and laugh together about them.

I'll be thinking about you as you wait for your husband to come out of surgery.

Take care,

[EVELYN]

Hello Ross, Nancy and Susan. This is my second attempt at posting. I tried to post a note to you about 10 minutes ago, but wasn't logged in, so they said, so I guess I've lost it....oops! If it posts a second time, I do apologize. I am very new to posting. Thank you all so much for your response to my first post. You are all right in that I have to focus on the positive rather than the negative. He is very positive, and I do think I am beginning to come to terms with it....I know he is a good candidate, I guess what scares me the most besides the possibility of not being able to restart the heart, is the risk of clots/stroke. I do feel very comfortable with our heart center and our surgeon. We are very lucky to have this facility within an hour and a half of our home.
His surgery is scheduled for 6/26/02, next Wednesday. Tomorrow he goes in for preadmission testing.
I am trying to read everything available and know as much as possible as to his homecare. I definitely will try to locate a shower stool....can I find one in a medical supply store?
Thanks for the walking advice. We are both walkers, so that will be something we will get back to as soon as possible. Thanks also for the breathing exercise advice.....Luckily, I'll be home for the summer with him.
Actually, after reading all your posts and getting as much information as I can, I do think I'm handling this better.....not great, but going towards better. I will try to focus on the positive side and that he is a good candidate. Thank you all for being there.....I feel very comfortable here.

[Ross]

You should be able to find a shower stool at a local pharmacy or medical supply business. I know my local Drug Mart drug store has them. You may want to let the hospital order it, that way, it might be covered by insurance. I'll see if I can't find you some after care info that will be a little more helpful. ;)

This link to click on, may help you some. It's more for the patient, but it gives you an idea of what to look for.
http://www.clevelandclinic.org/heartcenter/pub/guide/disease/recovery_ohs.htm

Another very good site is
www.heartcenteronline.com

Lots of info there! You must register, but registration is free.

[Mb]

Dear Evelyn:

There are a lot of us on the site who have been exactly where you are today. All of Nancy's comments are right on the button. She has been there, done that, tons of times.
My husbnad is 55, and had rheumatic fever at age 19. He had aortic and mitral valve surgery done October 3rd 2001. Evelyn, he was very verysick when they finally got him into surgery. His surgeon needed a full day, with no one backed up behind him, to put him on the schedule. By October 3rd, he couldn't walk 50 feet without being short of breath. If he talked for longer than 2 minutes, he was short of breath. He had it all...dizzy spells, fluid retention, etc. - THere was NO question that without the surgery, his time was very very short. Looking back, I know we were fortunate that he made it to the sugery date. Sometimes I think we were lucky, as it was at the point that it was either life with artificial valves, or dying before his time.

I have been positively amazed how wick some folks are when they come to this site, and then are posting afterwards about how it was easier than they thought., etc. etc. etc. I joined this group last summer, and since then we haven't lost even one person who posted. When you consider the age range, the variety of illnesses, etc.....that is truly amazing. I did read the same thing as Nancy....surgical mortality at 2%, but that does take into consideration the very elderly, second and third surgeries, etc. So for your hubby, It is probably so close to zero you wouldn't believe. When you consider that he really has no choice about having this surgery, and that you have no choice but to hold his hand on the journey, you will find peace. It happened to me about 2 weeks before surgery. I gave it up to God, knowing that it was His will, not mine, be done. So, my advice to you is simple. Take all of your worry, turn it over to your higher power. Clasp your husbands hand, and go on the journey up the mountain. At times you will lead.....and at times he will lead. But, you WILL get to the other side of the mountain, and let me tell you it is something grand. God Bless.

Marybeth

[EVELYN]

Thank you, Ross for that site about after care. I printed it out and read it to my husband who is at work. Thank you, MBerge....for such wonderful words. I do think I'm getting to that point. I have turned it over to God and have decided that he is in charge. Once you realize it's out of your hands and you can't "fix it," you're right, you do find peace. Not that I still don't have my moments, but I am trying to focus on just enjoying the time we have prior to surgery. Tomorrow is preadmission day, so while I'm waiting at the hospital, I will finish my grades for school....yes, we're still in...until next Wednesday, but I won't be there. Thank you all again, what wonderful people you all are. Evelyn

[bruizer]

Hi Evelyn,

I had a few months to think about all of the "what if's" prior to my Ross Procedure in December, 2000. Even though I had no symptoms, was in great shape running 4 miles a day, and had one of the best surgeons in the world, I still was stressed out, especially when my surgeon told me that there was a 1-2 percent risk. As some of the other people mentioned before, the thing that put me at peace was when a friend of mine who happens to be a psychologist, asked me where God was in all of this. It was at that point that I realized and accepted that he was in control. After that, I felt at peace, especially the morning of the surgery. I am sure everything will work out fine.

God Bless.

[Ross]

Evelyn, no need to be a stranger. Just because your not the one having the surgery, doesn't mean that now you can stay away. Sorry kiddo, you've been adopted. We'll be here anticipating hearing the good news when the surgery is complete and to answer any questions that may creep up in the meantime.

We all like to maintain control of our lives and the lives of those we love. It's very hard to "Let go and let God", when we're so used to being in charge. Believe me, we all feel the same way. It took me quite a while to come to terms, that this is something that I really have no control over what so ever. It seemed like no matter what answer I got, it was never good enough. The fact of the matter is, I didn't like the answers that I was getting. Why? Because I had to relinquish the control!

Keep in touch, We will be here. :)

[EVELYN]

Thought I would let you all know that my husband went for preadmission testing today. The class we went to was great and very informative. We're both hoping his surgery is the early one, as they schedule at 8, noon, and 5 p.m......We're both doing well....it's amazing how much at peace I've become. I truly do feel that it is rolling along on its own accord and know I will be very happy when it is finally over and he is in icu.....how about that, haven't heard of too many people happy that their husband will be in icu.....thank you all again. And Ross....thanks for adopting me, it's nice to know I have a place to go to chat with people who understand because they've been there. Evelyn

[Jennie]

Hiya Evelyn,

I just wanted to say that you and your hubby are in my prayers, especially on the Big Day next week. Hang tight, it will be over before you know it! We're here for you.

-JEnnie

[sylviayasgur]

hi evelyn!
welcome to this wonderful site. as you can already see, everyone here is so helpful, warm , caring and informative.
i, too, am the spouse and my husband, joey, had his ross procedure 9 months ago today and is _thank God_ doing better than ever!!!
my dad had his valve replacement and double bypass done 3 yrs ago by dr. paul damus at st. francis. who is the surgeon doing your husband's surgery? i'm sure you know that st. francis is one of the great heart hospitals with a fantastic track record. everyone gave such great advice... it's advice many of them gave to me 9 months ago.
please try and take it a day at a time for now. before you know it the surgery will be over and behind you and you will be helping your dear husband on his road to recovery.
we are all here with you and look forward to hearing how things go.
be well, sylvia

[EVELYN]

Hi all.....again, my thanks to you all. What a wonderful site this is; I'm so grateful to have found it. To answer your question, Sylvia, my husband's surgeon is Dr. James Taylor, and we are very comfortable with him. I still can't get over St. Francis, what a wonderful hospital. I'm so pleased we chose it or they accepted us. They're so patient, kind and are willing to explain everything again and again if necessary. They're professional, yet personal, which is so important. The only drawback is the parking....there is no way near enough, so you either have to get there early early or you drive around forever looking. They also have a parking garage, but my van is too high for it, so it's either valet parking or the street if no spots are available. Actually, though, that's the least of my worries!!!

Thank you all for your words of support. You've been wonderful and since I have turned it over to GOD, I'm a much more peaceful person. I know we have no control over what is going to happen, but I have also come to terms with what will definitely happen if he doesn't have the surgery....actually, I loved your post, Bruiser, when you said your friend said, "Where does God fit in all of this."

Tonight we're going to be out walking for cancer at our local high school. They have a wonderful nightwalk from 6 to noon Saturday and all the money they raise goes for cancer research. My husband feels great, so we're going and will walk about 2-3 hours on the track. They said at the hospital on Thursday that walking was great after surgery, so we will plan on doing much of that, too. He also saw his pillow....it's a big red heart!!!

Again, many thanks for everything, but especially your support. Thank you all for keeping us in your prayers.

Evelyn

[Nancy]

Hi Evelyn-

I'm struck with how much more calm you sound since your first post. That is so wonderful to read. It always helps to know others who've been through the same thing, and also to call on your faith when that's necessary.

You will both be fine throughout all of this.

[EVELYN]

Hi Nancy et. al......You're right, I have become quite a bit calmer; thanks to my faith and this list. It is so wonderful to be able to communicate with people who understand where you are and where you're going. It's very interesting in that I'm worried about my husband getting through the surgery, not having a clot, stroke, etc., and he's worried about feeling helpless when he gets home and not being able to do all he usually does. So this weekend we're doing "chores"....like filling the lawn tractor with gas so it will be full for me to mow and weeding, cleaning dogs ears, etc. etc. etc.......Actually it's good in that it is definitely keeping us busy and focused. This is also the first year I can say I'm still glad I'm in school for Monday and Tuesday......we go through Wednesday, but I definitely won't be there! We will find out what time his surgery is on Tuesday evening. They do surgery 3 times a day 8, 12, and 5, but most of the time the patients out of the hospital have the 8 or 12 slots. I'm hoping for the 8 am slot, but I'm sure everyone else who is scheduled on that day is also. He got his soaps to shower with the night before and morning of. Aside from that, we're just keeping focused. I hope I'm as good Wednesday morning as I am now.....I do realize it is out of my hands and in Gods. My cousin and her husband are coming up from Virginia....they just moved there....for the surgery, and my best girlfriend is driving in with us and home with her husband....he'll meet us there some time during the day.

Please keep us in your prayers.....I know we can get through this.
Thank you all.....more than you'll ever know.
Evelyn

[Nancy]

Hi Evelyn-

You will probably be very calm the day of surgery, at least right before he goes in. It's a relief in a way, to know that he's getting fixed up, and that he's in very capable hands.

Here's a little list of things to bring for yourself. Change for who knows what, if you need it. Something for headache. Some hard candies or other things for dry mouth. Breath freshener. It's a long day to sit there with a dry mouth and this is a good refresher. Some hand wipes. Can also be used for freshening up your face. Something for tummy upset, I brought Imodium and was glad to have it. If you have one of those little neck pillows, that's a really good thing to bring. Bring a large tote because you might want to put your husband's clothing in the car after he gets changed. Men's shoes are heavy to carry around.

Best of luck to you both and we'll all be waiting to hear how it went, so hope you can post when you have the chance.

[Mb]

Sweetie:

Nancy is right......you will be fairly calm. Since your faith has sustained you to now, there is no reason to think that He will abandon you when your need might be great.

Since we were traveling so far out of town for the surgery, there were other things, at home, that I made sure to take care of before leaving. My husband ended up in the hospital for 12 days or so, and because he has never recovered from anything easily, there was no reason for me to believe he would be one of those lucky "short timers", so I really prepared. I gave two people the access to our house.....just in case. I had our mail held, the newspaper, etc. - All of those things you do if you are going away on vacation.

The day of the surgery, i brought my rosary, and some kleenex, as well as some change for machines (soda).

I really hope this helps!

God bless you, and your husband on this journey.

Marybeth

[John & Joann]

Hi Evelyn,

You have received very good advice from the others. I would suggest getting a telephone debit card from Sam's, Costco, etc. This will be of major value if you have family out of the area. The patients look worse in recovery than they are. Cleveland Clinic limits visits so that the family stays calm.

Your case sounds very normal. Walking, breathing treatments, (they are a pain), a positive attitude, etc. will all make the recovery go better.

Expect some depression. It is important that you remain positive and offer encouragement. You may reach the point that you will be the "enemy" and take a beating. This is normal.

Let us know how we can help. Joann has 30.5 years of clicking and ticking.

God Bless!

[EVELYN]

Hello all....As you can probably see, it's very early in the morning in NY. Couldn't sleep, so I figured I'd get on my computer and re-read my emails. You guys all give me so much strength. Again, I can't thank you enough. I guess we're as ready as we're going to be. I know my husband, Tyce, is definitely ready. I don't think anyone who hasn't been in this position actually can understand fully what one is going through, especially the range of emotions. That's one of the best things about this list, everyone has been where we're walking. You are all much more strength than you'll ever know.

Today we find out the surgery time on Wednesday and will go from there. We are truly blessed to have a wonderful support system of friends and relatives who will be there for me at the hospital and for both of us when he gets home. As I told him the other day, I can handle the aftercare with absolutely no problem, I just want a guarantee that you'll make it to that point!!

Thank you all again for all your strength. I will definitely post as soon as is feasible and let you all know how we've done. Please, please keep us in your prayers, you are all in mine.

Evelyn

[Ross]

You know we'll keep you both in thought and prayer.

Everything will be fine and it'll be over before you know it.

Look forward to your post surgery post. ;)

Relax and take it easy.

[ALCapshaw]

Hello Evelyn,

Hope all is going well for you and your husband.

I'd like to add a couple of recommendations:

FIRST, find out WHO will be responsible for WHAT post-op.
Typically, the surgeons want to pass you off to your cardiologist and / or PCP ASAP and generally this works OK.

In my case, I had no problems from the surgery but I had a LOT of minor complications, especially reactions and interactions from so many new drugs (in fairly high dosages). My surgeon's office called me a couple of days post op and basically said, "don't call us, call your cardiologist or primary care physician". Admittedly, this saved me from having to drive 100 miles for checkups with the surgeon but it was NOT clear what issues the cardiologist would cover and what issues the PCP would cover. We worked it out, but it's better to know beforehand.

SECOND, PUSH the Breathing Exercises (with the incentive spirometer). I did the recommended number of sets but ended up with 'Walking Pneumonia' 3 weeks after my Bypass surgery and fluid between one of my lungs and the chest wall after my recent Valve Surgery which resulted in a couple of visits to my PCP, a trip to the ER, several drugs (and drug reactions / interactions), and increased use of the 'breathing machine' to finally cure. It seems that one of my lungs did not inflate fully. I can't help but wonder if all that couldn't have been avoided by simply pushing my breathing exercises harder from the start.

'AL'

[Granbonny]

Hi Evelyn..My prayers will be with you and your hubby on big day (tomorrow?) I am 3 months post-op and doing great..He will be here before you know it. Bonnie

[Mb]

Dear Evelyn:

I just wanted to drop you a line, to join the others in wishing you well tomorrow. There is not much else one cay say, except that you and your husband will be in the hearts and prayers and thoughts of everyone over the next days.

Go in peace. We will see you on the other side of the mountain.


Marybeth

[Johnny Stephens]

Evelyn, best of luck to Tyce and yourself tomorrow. We'll be sending lots of positive thoughts your way. See you on the other side!

Johnny

[EVELYN]

Hello All.....Many many thanks for your thoughts and prayers. You guys are truly wonderful angels who have come into our lives. I will forever be grateful for your prayers, thoughts and kindness. We just found out that Tyce will go to surgery at noon. We're leaving tomorrow morning at 5:30 as we have to be at the hospital at 7. My gut is that he won't be conscious when I see him and probably not until very late in the evening. I know visiting hours are from 7:30 until 8, but as long as everything looks good, I'll just kiss him goodbye and see him on Thursday....I know they're very strict.

Again, thank you for your prayers. This isn't the way I planned to spend the first day of my retirement from teaching, but I'm looking for many many years of dog show trips, traveling and being with my best friend.

Thank you all, again.

Ev

[Jennie]

Hi Ev,

Just wishing you and Tyce all the best tomorrow. I'll be thinking of you and praying for you both. Hopefully everything will go wonderfully and this will all be behind you in no time. Don't stress out too much. It'll be rough going for a bit, but just go along for the ride and take it one day at a time. I'm looking forward to hearing how things go!

God bless,
Jennie

[wweir]

Ev.

We are all hoping all goes well. From what I hear and read, it will. In fact I am planning on being scheduled for AVR replacement in Aug.

I must tell you that I have the same fears and concerns as you do so I hope all goes well and please know that you are in my prayers as well. Hang in there and keep us posted.

Walter

AVR

[sylviayasgur]

hi evelyn!
you and tyce will be in my thoughts and prayers tomorrow. i'm sure you are in good hands. the docs and st. francis are great. please post when you can so that we'll know how things are going with you both.
all the best, sylvia

[EVELYN]

To Everyone.....I'm not really sure whether this post should be in presurgery or postsurgery, but I just had to let you ALL know that Tyce is fine, the surgery was successful and everything went well. We went in at 7 a.m. for a 12:00 surgery. He went into the OR at 12.20 and was out in recovery at 3:45. The surgeon called me and told me I could see him in ICU at about 4:30. All is fine, except that he said he feels as though he was hit by 4 mack trucks. As I write this it's 9:40 at night, and I'm a couch potato, but I just wanted to let you all know he is fine, majorly hurting, but very fine. He's on morphine via IV line and when I called the ICU at 8:45 they said he was resting fairly comfortably. looks like he'll be with us for a bit longer.

Thank you all so very, very much. I know I couldn't have gotten through this surgery without your guidance, support and wonderful outpouring of love. It's very amazing the many blessings one realizes in times of crisis.....I would verymuch love to meet you and thank you all personally......you truly are my angels. I definitely will post again tomorrow, but right now I'm brain dead and need to get some rest.......thank you all, from the bottom of my healthy heart. Evelyn

[Nancy]

FANTASTIC Evelyn and Tyce!

Nice surgical work, short time in and out. Well, all that's left is the healing now.

Did we forget to tell you? They have a ten wheeler that they run back and forth across your chest during this surgery:p

You should see Joe's tire tracks.

Seriously, I'm so glad for both of you. Ya did good!

[wweir]

EV,

Outstanding. I am so glad to hear all went well. Keep us posted on how things are going.

You need to pull for me in Aug.

Walter

[Ross]

;) It's nice to hear that all is well. I'll wait for your next post, after you've had some rest and get to visit him again.
Now that surgery is over, start posting in the post surgery forum. lol

[Bill Hall]

Evelyn - Great to hear Tyce made it through the surgery and is on his way to recovery. I missed most of this chain of postings, but just wanted to send my good wishes. I was born on Long Island (Queens), so I am thinking good thoughts about you.

[Gail in Ca]

For my 1st AVR in '89 , I was told the problem rate was about 5% and 95% successful.
I didn't even want to know more than that and was feeling very confident about the whole procedure.
The night before my surgery I listened to a favorite tape and it made me just know I would come thru with flying colors.
Now, for my 2nd AVR I didn't even ask what my chances were because I came in from the ER and was in bad shape, but still feeling positive about the surgery. My surgeon and his chief resident came in and were so confident about my surgery that I wasn't even concerned about complications. It wasn't until after my surgery anyway that the surgeon told me I was at death's door coming into it, so I would imagine that my risk was higher.
If you are in good health going in, I would think the risks are low.
Gail

[Mb]

Hi!

That is terrific news! Congratulations, and welcome to the other side.

Gail's comments are right on. I do think you are SO much better off going into the surgery in fairly good shape, before CHF has set in, or that it is an emergency. Complications afterwards seem to be so much less as well.

Again, congratulations, and best wishes now, for a speedy recovery.


Marybeth